My Funny Farm - Chapter 17 – And In Walked a Nightmare – Part 2 of 2

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 17 – And In Walked a Nightmare – Part 2 of 2

 

Nichole left me for a few minutes.  When she came back, she had another baby bottle in her hands.  “Come here baby,” she told me as she opened my gate before settling herself on one end of the couch.

I was glad to stop my play and my stupid babbling.  I crawled out of my playpen and over to the couch where she had me get up on it with my head in her lap.  I got the picture quickly.  She was literally going to feed me that bottle like Caitlin and Emily did.  Okay, I could deal with that.  Her hand though did a very thorough diaper check on me again before she plucked my pacifier out and stuck the bottle in instead.  Suck…out…suck…out.  I was afraid of screwing up, so I concentrated extra hard on doing it right.

She was looking down into my eyes as I drank.  “Look at me,” she said softly.  “Don’t close your eyes, just keep looking up at me.”

Okay, that much was easy.  In the position I was in, I was already looking up at her.

“Relax as much as you can, but don’t stop looking at me.  Whatever you do, don’t close your eyes.  Feel yourself relax though.  Feel the sucking motion of your mouth drain all your cares and worries away.  Don’t close your eyes though.  Keep looking at me!”

I realized that in trying to relax, my eyes had started to close.  I opened them wide.

“Good,” she said.  “Just keep looking at me.  In fact, maybe this will help.  Can you see my necklace?”  Her hand reached up and pulled it out a bit.  It was a simple thing with a blue crystal in it.  “Stare at my pretty necklace,” she told me.  “Just make sure you keep your eyes open while you’re enjoying your baby bottle.”

The more she told me to keep my eyes open, the more I realized I wanted to close them.  I fought the urge.

“It’s a pretty necklace, isn’t it,” she said.  “Can you see how shiny it is?  So shiny.  Stare at it.  I know your eyes are growing tired since sucking on that bottle relaxes you and you want to close them, but don’t.  Fight it.  Keep your eyes open.  I don’t want you to fall asleep.  I want to see you looking at my pretty necklace while you concentrate on sucking on your bottle.  Suck and stare…suck and stare.  I know your eyes are growing more difficult to keep open.  I can see it.  Fight it.  Keep them open for me.  Don’t fall asleep.  Suck…and stare…and relax.  Relax and stare at my pretty blue necklace, and keep your eyes open.  Suck and stare and relax.  Relax.  Relax and suck.  Don’t close your eyes yet.  I’ll tell you when you can close them.  Just not yet.  Suck and stare.  Suck and relax.  Suck and relax.  Keep your eyes open.  I’m going to count to three.  When I say three, you can finally close your eyes and fall into a deep sleep, but not until I say the number three.  Keep your eyes open.  Suck and stare at my necklace.  See how shiny it is.  Suck and relax.  Relax and stare.  Keep your eyes open.  One!”

She paused for a moment, then said.  “Suck…and stare.  Suck and relax.  Fight the urge to sleep, even though you desperately want to sleep.  Suck…and relax.  Suck…and relax.  Two!”

Once again she paused.  I was working hard to keep my eyes open and keep looking at her necklace.  It was pretty.  It was so shiny.  But my eyes wanted to close so badly.  Why wouldn’t she let me?

“Suck…and relax,” she said.  “Suck…and stare at my necklace.  Suck…and relax.  You want so badly to close your eyes and fall into a deep sleep.  We’re almost there.  It’s going to happen soon.  Almost there.  Suck…and relax.  Keep your eyes open.  Suck…and relax.  Suck…and….  Three!”

“Nichole says wake up!”

My eyes flew open.  I wondered if I had actually fallen asleep for a moment there, but that would have been impossible.  At least she had stopped talking now and I could relax a bit more.  As I drank my bottle, I wondered if she had been trying to hypnotize me.  I knew for a fact though that she hadn’t managed it.  Not only had she been very inept at it and not known what she was doing, but she had been making sure I stayed awake the entire time, just the opposite of what a hypnotist would do.  So no, she hadn’t tried that at all, or if she did, she was simply too lousy at it for it to possibly work.

My eyes looked at the bottle she was holding to my lips.  It struck me as strange that it was almost full still.  By now it should have been nearly empty.  Oh well.  It was still nice to lay there and let her feed me like that.

Eventually the bottle emptied, and I felt almost disappointed.  Her feeding me had so far been the only enjoyable thing she had made me do all day.  She shooed me down from the couch and had me crawl back into my play area to play while she carried my empty bottle back to the kitchen.

I made it all the way into the area before I realized I was going to need to pee.  That’s when I suddenly discovered something else.  I’m sure it’s probably not the case for everyone else, but I discovered that with that humongous thing stuck in my rear end, not being able to close the sphincter muscles around my ass also made it incredibly difficult for me to tighten the other muscles to keep me from peeing.  I only realized I was going to need to pee soon for a few seconds before I suddenly realized I was already peeing, and I couldn’t tighten those muscles enough to stop it.  That surprised the hell out of me.  So much so that I knelt there on the floor just staring at my thin diaper.  Fortunately, the peeing didn’t last very long, and I don’t think too much came out.  I searched around me and didn’t see or feel any leaks, but I had just finished peeing and could still feel all that wetness puddled under my butt.

“Did baby just do wetties?” she asked with a laugh.

I looked up to see she was back already.  I was too embarrassed to answer her.

“Play!” she ordered.  “And don’t forget to talk to your toys.”

Ugh!  I went back to pushing the buttons on that electronic animal noise maker.

“Play with something else,” she said after a few minutes.

I was guessing she was as tired of hearing that thing as I was, which meant that I’d have to “play” with it more often.  I found the blocks and that stackable ring thing and used the pieces to make a strange pile.

“I don’t hear you talking to your toys,” she prompted me.

I turned and saw her holding her cellphone up.  She was filming me!  “Don’t!” I said around the plug in my mouth.

She laughed and replied, “Keep playing.”  Then a moment later, she said, “Play faster!”

Faster?  How?  And then I felt that horrible pain in my groin again and it sent me rolling around on the floor.  When it stopped she said, “Play faster!  And babble faster!”

I grabbed the nearest toy, the spiral ramp and rolled the balls down it as fast as I could, all the while babbling incoherently around the plug in my mouth.  I could hear her laughing as she filmed me.

“Find something else to play with,” she ordered.

I searched around for something…anything…that could possibly hold my attention.  My eyes finally fell on the stuffed…creatures.  I crawled over and found the unicorn.  The small stuffed doll was nearby.  Okay.  Maybe she’d be happy with me playing with them.  I stuck the doll on the unicorn’s back and galloped it all around me.  Once again I started to babble like an idiot.  For some strange reason though, I was enjoying playing with the doll.  In fact, the unicorn wasn’t too bad either.  I’d have to remember this game.

I looked over towards her.  She was no longer filming me, but she seemed to have the happiest look on her face.  What was wrong with her?  I could do nothing though but keep playing since she was still watching me so closely.  The pink pig soon joined my…uh…fun, and I hate to admit it, but for once I was enjoying playing with those toys.

I don’t now how long I played like that before I looked back at her again.  She was kneeling on the other side of the fence, obviously filming me with her cellphone like she had done before.  Once again I leveled a nasty look in her direction, which only made her laugh as she continued to film me.  And then she tried something new.

“Show me what a smart baby you are,” she said.  “Count to five for me.”

Now what kind of dumb game was she playing?  I plucked the pacifier from my mouth myself.  “One, two, three, five!  There!”  I stuck the pacifier back in again and went back to playing with the stuffed animals.  Count to five.  Of all the dumb questions!  At least she had laughed and not punished me.

“I’m sorry baby,” she suddenly announced, but you’re going to have to stop playing for a little while.  It’s lunchtime.  But you can come back and play with them later.  Come on.”  She opened my gate to let me out.  “Crawl out to the kitchen with me.”

Lunchtime.  Just when for once I was enjoying myself.  Oh well.  I crawled over to the gate, but she stopped me there and did a very thorough diaper check.

“Hm!” she said unhappily.  “Not wet enough.  And it’s been too long since I know you wet right after your bottle.  Remember, don’t hold back or you’ll get punished for making your diapers leak.”

Yeah, I remembered that…now.  I had simply been too busy playing as fast as possible to remember it before.  Instead of crawling, I sat up on my knees and concentrated.  Yeah, I could easily feel the need to pee now.  I let it out, looking down toward my diaper the entire time.  More came out than before though and I worried about it leaking.

She laughed as she watched me wetting myself.  “I hope you didn’t pee too much,” she said.

I didn’t reply, but leaking was my concern too.

“Come along baby,” she said as she turned to walk away.  “Lunchtime.  Let’s go.”

I followed her on my hands and knees out toward the kitchen, but halfway through the living room I started to feel something horrible.  Something that tickled a tiny bit.  I stopped and looked down at one of my legs.  Darn!  There was a tiny bit of wetness leaking out.  No!

“Baby!” she said angrily from the kitchen entrance.  “Is your diaper leaking?”

I looked up at her with a rather helpless look on my face.

“Bad baby!  You were holding back and didn’t pee soon enough.”  With that, she held her cellphone out towards me and pressed the button.  Yeah, I went rolling around the living room in absolute agony.  And worse, she kept the pain coming.  And I had no way at all to stop it.  “No.  No.  No.  Stop.  Please stop.  No.”  But the pain continued.  When it ended I laid there on my back for a few moments with tears rolling down my cheeks.  Damn that had hurt!

“Baby!” she said sternly.  “Lunchtime.  Get your butt in here.”

I crawled into the kitchen and climbed up into my chair.  She put my bib around my neck and a few minutes later set one of my colorful plates in front of me, this time filled with baby food.  At least she gave me the spoon and let me eat it myself.

After lunch, she changed that soaking wet diaper for me, except that when she put the new thin diaper on me, she did like she had earlier and dumped an entire glass of cold water in it first.  Yeah, it was very cold when she fastened the tapes.  I suddenly couldn’t wait to wet the thing.

This time when I got to my play area, I made a point to keep watching for those telltale signs that I might need to pee, because what I didn’t need was any more of that horrible pain.  It hurt!

I played, but not that long before she again called me out and had me crawl up onto the couch where she started feeding me another bottle.  As far as I knew, which was next to nothing, it was too early yet for my nap, but that didn’t seem to be stopping her.  Of course, she hadn’t given me anything to drink with my lunch, so maybe that’s what this bottle was for.  I laid there sucking, trying to relax while I concentrated on the motion.  She was looking down into my eyes and smiling.

“Nichole says to go night-night,” she said.  At least I think she said that.  I wasn’t really sure.  What I know I remember was right after she said that, she must have repeated it, and this time I got it correctly.  “Nichole says to wake up.”  My eyes flew open.  “Don’t fall asleep,” she told me.  “Just concentrate on relaxing while you drink your bottle.”

That much I could do.  Easily.  I laid there and drank, doing my best to enjoy drinking and sucking.  And I did enjoy it.  It was…so relaxing.  I noticed though that my tummy felt fuller than it usually did when I drank a bottle.  Oh well.  Must have been all that baby food for lunch.

After my bottle, it was back to playing with the stuffed animals, but this time, even though I was playing, I tried extra hard to watch for even the slightest telltale sign that I might have to pee.  I was more worried about being punished for leaking than ever.  In fact, it was practically all I could think about.

Surprisingly, just a short time later, I realized that it might be possible for me to pee again.  Like I had done before, I sat on my knees with them spread apart and watched my diaper for any visual signs of a leak while I peed inside of it.  I was so relieved when I didn’t see any problems at all.  I did notice though that she was laughing at me, but that was her problem.  I didn’t have a problem.  I had managed to pee at the slightest sign of it.  All I had to do now to keep from being zapped again was to keep doing it that way…while I went back to playing.

She didn’t seem to be watching me as closely this time, but she still stayed in the room, mostly sitting on the couch with a glass that I recognized as one from the liquor cabinet.  She did come over a while later and start filming me again.

“Count to five for me,” she said as she held her camera up, filming me. 

Again?  “Why?” I asked around the plug in my mouth.

“Just do it.  Or do you want to feel more pain instead.”

That I could do without.  I pulled my pacifier out and counted.  “One, two, three, five!  Okay?”

“Yes,” she replied with a laugh.  “Perfect.”

“Dumb,” I muttered as I put my pacifier back in and went back to galloping the unicorn around with that dolly on its back.

I got another bottle just before my nap, and once again she fed it to me.  And it’s the strangest thing, but again she had to tell me to wake up.  “Nichole says to wake up.”  I guess being fed my bottles was more relaxing than I thought.  After that bottle though, my diaper was again thoroughly checked, and I was put into my crib for my nap.  She seemed to take great delight in raising the bars on my crib so I couldn’t get out.

“Don’t forget, don’t hold back,” she told me before she turned out the light.  She held her cellphone up to remind me of the consequences.

As she walked out, I remembered that today was Thursday.  Mrs. Lowrey had been there on Thursdays, Fridays, and Mondays.  Which meant that Nichole would probably be coming back again tomorrow.  I wasn’t looking forward to that.  In fact, I was already dreading it.

As I laid there, I did my best to concentrate on two things, making sure I wasn’t holding back at all…and the rhythmic but calming sucking on my pacifier.  Suck…out…suck…out…suck.  Yeah.  Life sucked.

Before I fell asleep, I felt that telltale sign that I might have to pee.  I was glad to feel it.  A moment later, lying on my back, it was gone, and my diaper was a bit wetter.  Now I just had to hope I could keep feeling it, even if I fell asleep.  In fact, I was so worried about it, that I didn’t sleep a wink.  I laid there the entire time concentrating as hard as I could on trying to pee as soon as I felt the slightest suggestion of an urge.  Twice more it happened before she finally came back and “woke me up.”

She lowered the bars on my crib and immediately did a thorough diaper check on me.  “What a good baby you were,” she told me.  “You didn’t hold back at all while you slept.  And see, you’re soaked.  In fact, I think if you peed anymore, you could have overflowed your diaper.  Come on,” she said as she pulled on my hand to get me down from the crib.  “Let’s get you changed.”

Like before, she strapped me down to the changing table with my arms rendered helpless.  She removed my diaper and made a face.  “Pew!  Your diaper is a bit stinky.”  She was making it sound like I was more than just wet, even though with that plug in my ass, that was completely impossible.

Yes, she poured water into this new diaper as well, and it was just as cold as the last one had been.  Then it was back to more playing.

She interrupted my play one more time to feed me yet another bottle and I distinctly remember her yelling at me to wake up again.  Why did I keep falling asleep when she fed me?  It didn’t make sense.

I was glad when I finally finished drinking that bottle and could get back to playing with the stuffed dolly and unicorn, but that didn’t last very long before she pulled me out and put me back on the changing table again.  This time she worked hard at removing that huge thing in my ass, and trust me, my ass was numb!  After that, she worked at getting that painful…whatever it was that was attached to my dick off of me.  I can’t tell you how relieved I felt the moment it was gone.  This time she didn’t pour water into my diaper, and this time she put one of the new thick diapers on me before finishing me off by putting the skirt I had worn that morning back on me.  I already knew though what was going to happen very soon since that plug had been in my ass all day.  Smelly time!  Oh well.  At least the plug was gone.

Half an hour later, Emily came home.  She and Nichole talked for a few minutes and Nichole left to go home.  I was glad she was gone.  What a nightmare.  It was about that time that I realized that for once I hadn’t messed myself helplessly after having the plug in my ass removed.  At least, it hadn’t happened so far.  I mentally celebrated that situation.

When Caitlin came home, I tried to tell them both about the huge plug Nichole had used on me and about that other thing she had attached to my penis to bring me pain, but neither of the girls believed any of it could have been nearly as bad as it was.

All evening long, all I could think about was the fact that Nichole would be back again tomorrow, and I would have to suffer through it all one more time.  But tomorrow was also Friday, the day that James was supposed to talk to me.  My mind was totally focused on telling him all about this conspiracy against me, and demanding to know if it was real or not.

 

My Funny Farm - Chapter 17 – And In Walked a Nightmare – Part 1 of 2

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 17 – And In Walked a Nightmare – Part 1 of 2

 

“Good morning babyyyy!”

Ugh!  Why the hell did Emily and Caitlin both have to be so cheerful about it?  This time it was Emily who woke me up.  Two seconds later, I had a baby bottle full of baby formula stuck between my lips.  At least my hands were free so I could hold the thing myself.  I was also happy that those miserable booties with the spikes in the soles were gone from my feet.  I was glad they had removed them last night before they put me to bed.  I hadn’t been looking forward to trying to sleep with them on.

I drank my morning bottle with my usual required rhythm.  Actually, it never even occurred to me to not drink it that way.  Besides, what else was I going to do?  Emily had given me the bottle, but she hadn’t bothered to lower the side of my crib.  I was still staring out at my nursery through prison bars.

As far as I could tell, all was back to being business as usual, but then my day had just started.  Who knew what surprises it might bring?  When my bottle was empty, Caitlin got me out of my crib, and I was able to walk to the breakfast table where I got to eat eggs and bacon by myself.  Then Emily took me back to my room where she changed my diaper and stuck me in another skirt outfit…that I secretly loved but would never let anyone else know.  I got sat down in front of the TV to watch those same stupid cartoons with another bottle of that nutritional drink, this time chocolate flavored.

And that was when my day went to hell.  Literally!

“Hello everybody!” Nichole’s voice sang as she walked in from the garage.  It was only then that I remembered that Nichole had volunteered to watch me instead of having Mrs. Lowrey come in.  That fact concerned me.

A few minutes later, both Emily and Caitlin kissed me goodbye and wished me a good day, and I was left alone with Nichole.  She walked over to me in front of the TV and stared down at me.  “Oh…” she said.  “We’re going to have some fun today.”

I wondered if she was going to start playing with my toys too.

“They’re gone now,” she said.  “And I’m here with you all to myself.”  She leaned down closer to me.  “Welcome to your worst nightmare!”  And then she laughed…evilly.  “Be right back,” she told me.  “I suggest you finish that bottle by then or there’ll be hell to pay.”

One…who did she think she was?  And two…something about her had me scared to death!  I went back to work on my bottle, knowing full well that there was no way to drink one of those things quickly.  I wondered if she was aware of that fact.

She disappeared, going out towards the garage.  It was a few minutes before she came back.  She glanced at me as she walked right past me carrying a large shopping bag in her hand.  She stayed in my room for a few minutes then finally came back to me.

“Are you done yet?” she asked, looking down at me and my bottle.

I held the bottle up to show her there was only about half an inch of that drink still in it.

“Finish it.  Now!” she ordered.

I put the bottle back to my lips while she stood over me, waiting.  When the bottle finally drained dry, she took the thing from me and shoved my big pacifier back between my lips.  Then she disappeared with the bottle back into the kitchen.  She was back all too soon though where she grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet, then pulled me straight into the nursery where she quickly pulled down that skirt I secretly liked and tossed it aside.  She left the pretty top on me though.

She made me get up on my changing table.  Before she strapped me in, she bent my arms back before pulling the strap across them and my chest, and she pulled that strap extra tight.  A lot tighter than Emily and Caitlin ever pulled it.  There was no way I was going to fall off that table, and no way I could move my arms.  They were just as trapped as the rest of me.

“You know,” she said to me.  “When Chris had one of his men build this thing, we insisted that he make it with these two straps so that it would be more like a real baby’s changing table.  Can’t have the baby fall off and hurt himself, now can we.  But what Chris didn’t know was that we had other reasons for making sure this thing had straps, and not just one, but two.  Of course, those men who built it didn’t know that most changing tables only have one strap.”

Yeah, I had seen that it had two straps, although I didn’t know why.  Emily and Caitlin only ever used the one that went across my chest.  Why have another one down by my legs?

Strapped to the table, she removed the big diaper I was wearing and dumped it into the diaper pail, even though it was still dry.  Totally clean!  Why?  That was a complete waste.

“Don’t go anywhere,” she said with a smirk.  She disappeared for a few minutes and came back with a washcloth that she used to thoroughly clean my genitals.  Again, I wondered why.  She had cleaned off all the stuff that the girls lathered on me to help prevent diaper rash.

And then she did the strangest thing of all to me.  From her bag, she pulled a length of rope and tied it around my ankles, binding them together.  She used that rope to help pull my legs up in the air and back towards my head, pulling them as far up as she could.  I screamed my protest even with that big pacifier in my mouth.  She did something to tie the rope off and I was stuck in that position, with my butt very much exposed.  Why the hell hadn’t she simply rolled me over the way the girls did?

I struggled to get loose.  I struggled to get myself into any kind of better position, but between the rope tied to my ankles and the strap holding the rest of me down, going anywhere was impossible.  “What are you doing?” I tried to say, even though it didn’t come out very clearly due to my pacifier.

Her only response was to smack my bottom rather hard with her hand.  Ouch!

She walked over to my dresser and opened the top drawer.  She dug around for a moment then came up with something.  “Here it is,” she said as she held up that butt plug I hated so much.  She stared at it for a moment then laughed.  “How ridiculous!  This little thing isn’t going to do the job at all.”  With a slight toss, she dropped it back into the drawer and closed it.  “But don’t worry, I special ordered something else for you that’s going to work much better.  And I even paid for special delivery so I could get it right away.  Wasn’t that nice of me?”

Somehow, I didn’t think I needed to answer.  I had no idea what she had in mind for me.  I did know though that I wasn’t looking forward to finding out.

She came back to my changing table and started searching the top shelf.  “Here it is,” she said as she pulled something out.  A moment later, I felt her messing with my asshole as she started spreading lots of that lubricant that the girls used on me whenever they stuck that butt plug in me.

“Got to use lots I’m afraid,” she told me as she continued to push it way up into my exposed ass.  Finally, she stopped and went back to her big shopping bag where she pulled something out.  She messed around with it below my butt where I couldn’t see what she was doing.

“Open wide,” she told me as if she was feeding me like Caitlin did.  “Here comes the train.”

The train?

“Choo-choo,” she said, and then I felt something big pressed up against my backside.  Something I could tell was obviously much wider than my asshole.

I yelled in pain as she started trying to push the thing into me.  “Stop!  Stop!  It’s too big.  You’re hurting me!  Stop!”

But she kept going, pushing, pulling my butt cheeks around, doing everything possible to work that huge thing into my ass.  And the pain!  “Owww!”  I protested vehemently, but she ignored all of it.  And then the thing seemed to ease up, but just slightly.

“Don’t worry,” she said as she finally backed away from me.  “It’s in now, and trust me, it’ll stay in.  In fact, more than likely I’ll have a time trying to get it out of you.”  She laughed.  “Maybe I should just leave it there permanently.”  She chuckled again.

“It’s too big!” I complained.  “It’s killing me!”

“No it’s not!” she replied.  “In fact, it’s the smallest one I got.  But don’t worry, I bought the entire set of three, so you have two bigger ones to look forward to as soon as you get used to that one.”

I tried pushing with all my muscles to dislodge the thing even a bit, but it was as if there was nothing there for my muscles to push against.  And even stranger, with that big thing in my ass, I didn’t feel like I had to poop like that other butt plug did to me.  I was guessing it was either too big for my brain to register that I might have to poop, or more likely, she had damaged something when she was putting it in.  In fact, I now wondered if my asshole might be bleeding.  I considered that a good possibility.  All I really knew was that I wanted it out, even though I knew for a fact that she wouldn’t be taking it out anytime soon.

Now that the thing was in me, she untied the rope and let my feet flop back to the changing table.  Then she completely removed the rope that had been binding my ankles together.  I was glad to have the rope gone, but I’d much rather have whatever she had stuck up into my ass to be gone instead.  It still hurt, and lying there like that it felt really strange back there.

She went back to searching in the big shopping bag she had brought with her, and I went back to struggling to get my arms free.  It wasn’t happening, but I tried anyway.  When she came back, she had something in her hands that I could easily identify…a rather thin diaper.  I remembered then about her idea to keep me in thin diapers so she could tell if I was holding back or not.  Actually, with that big thing stretching my ass out so wide, I wasn’t sure if I could hold back on my pee.  Trying to tighten the muscles around my ass was completely impossible.  I wasn’t sure at all if after having that big thing back there my ass muscles would ever work again.

She lifted my legs and slid that thin diaper under me.  After wearing all the much thicker diapers for a while now, even just laying on it, I could easily feel the difference.  And that was despite how weird my backside felt with that huge thing in my ass.  Once the diaper was under me though, she bought that second strap over my legs and fastened it tightly, further trapping me to the table.  Why?  And why wouldn’t just one strap be enough?  I had already been trying to get myself free with no luck at all.  Now she was making it twice as difficult since I could no longer move my legs.

She went back to her bag again and searched through it a bit longer this time.  When she came back, I couldn’t see what she had in her hands.  Whatever it was, it was something small.  Trapped the way I was, I couldn’t see what she was doing as she grabbed my flaccid penis and began doing something with it.  Trust me, she wasn’t trying to make me feel good.  As far as I could tell, she wasn’t trying to make it feel bad either.  She was just…uh….  And then I realized she was fastening something to it.  Whatever it was, seemed to take her a few minutes.  When she was done, she pulled both straps holding me down to the table a bit tighter, making sure I couldn’t get up.  “Don’t go anywhere,” she teased before walking out of the room.

Don’t go anywhere?  I really wanted to go somewhere.  In fact, going to anywhere like she had said I shouldn’t, sounded just fine to me.  The entire time she was gone, I struggled and did everything I could to get myself free.  It didn’t happen.  Not even a little.

I was more surprised when she finally came back holding a glass of what looked like water from the kitchen.  But the surprises didn’t stop there.  She walked up to me and released the straps holding my legs down.  Then she spread my legs apart a bit and slowly poured that entire big glass of water onto the diaper she had just put under my butt.

“No more dry diapers for you,” she told me as she looked down into my face.  “These thin diapers can actually hold quite a bit, but they don’t work very well at soaking all that pee up very quickly.  The only way you’re going to be able to keep from leaking now is to pee just a little bit at a time.  Which means you’re going to have to do it a lot more often.  The more often you pee, the less will come out each time, making it that much less likely that you’ll leak.  And trust me, you don’t want to leak from now on, because every time I see any pee running down outside of that diaper, you’re going to get severely punished.  And I mean something that’s going to hurt you…a lot!”

What was she going to do, spank me?  I had no idea, but whatever it was, I knew I wasn’t looking forward to it.

With that, she pulled that soaking wet diaper up between my legs and fastened the tapes firmly.  The diaper felt ice cold all over against my skin.

“Is it cold baby?” she asked with a chuckle.  “Only you can warm it up, and you know what you’ll have to do to do that.”  She laughed.  She was still laughing as she once again fastened that strap holding my legs down.  Why?  She had already put the new diaper on me.

She disappeared for a few minutes, then came back with her cellphone.  She fussed around with it for a few moments, then said.  “Okay.  I’ve been dying to try this out ever since I ordered the thing.”

I wondered what she was talking about.  I shouldn’t have.

She pressed something on her phone and major pain erupted in my penis and balls.  I bucked and struggled for all I was worth, but of course, tied down like I was, I could do nothing at all to stop it.  It felt like someone had plugged my penis and balls directly into an electric outlet.  The pain finally stopped, and I laid there panting despite the pacifier still in my mouth.  I realized then that she was laughing.  And then the pain came again, and once again I went wild fighting my bonds.  I was so glad when she finally ended the pain.

“Goodness that’s fun,” she told me.

Not for me!  Trust me.

“All you have to do to not get hurt today, is to do absolutely everything I want.  And of course, keep peeing freely all the time too.  Remember, that’s the punishment that awaits you every time I see the least bit of a leak from your diapers.  In fact, that’s the pain that you’re going to get every time you don’t do anything I tell you to.”  She leaned down closer to my face and stared closely into my eyes.  “And trust me, I paid enough for this little toy that I’m very much looking forward to playing with it.”

Just looking at her made me believe her.

“Let’s get you down now…baby.”

She unfastened the straps and helped me down from the changing table.  I wasn’t sure what to do with myself after being zapped by her…new toy.  Standing up, I was immediately aware of two things, how much thinner that diaper felt fastened to my butt, and how huge that thing was that she had shoved up into my butt.  I was only still amazed that the thing didn’t make me feel like I needed to poop like that smaller plug had.  My hands tried to feel through the diaper just what she had fastened to me, but even through that thin diaper, I couldn’t tell anything.

“Down on the floor!” she commanded.  “You’re a baby now.  It’s time you started acting more like one.  And that includes crawling.  I know Emily and Caitlin bought you those booties to keep you from standing up, but I don’t see why we should need them at all.  All you need is a bit more…education in how to behave.  And today we’re going to be working on just that.”

I was still standing, but I immediately felt that pain erupt in my groin again.  “Down!” she commanded.  I dropped to the floor quickly and the pain went away.  Whew!  “And stay down!” she ordered.

Yeah, I got that picture already.

“Playtime,” she ordered.  “Into your playpen.”  She watched as I slowly crawled my way into my fenced-in play area, where she closed the gate behind me.  “Now play…like a baby,” she told me.

I sat there on my thinly diapered butt and watched as she settled herself on the couch with her feet up in such a way that she could keep watching me.  I also didn’t miss that cellphone she kept in her hand.

“Play!” she ordered.  “And don’t forget to pee as soon as possible.”

Play.  How?  With what?  Only Caitlin and Emily so far had figured out how to play with all the useless toys scattered around me.

And then the pain came again, and I started rolling around on the floor while my hand tried to grab whatever was attached to me under my diaper.  By the time the pain finally went away, she was standing right outside the fence holding that cellphone up in her hand where I could see it.

“I said play baby,” she ordered sternly.  “Now!”

I quickly grabbed the closest thing to me, that spiral ramp.  I found a few of the balls that were made to roll down it and I started rolling them down, one after another, catching them at the bottom and sticking them back on the top where they could roll down again.

“Are you sucking that pacifier properly?” she asked.  “I know both Caitlin and Emily have been working hard to get you to do it the way they want.”

Fearing the pain, I turned my head so she could see.  Suck…out…suck…out…suck.  Yeah, every bit of my life sucked, and today I was living a nightmare in total fear.  And I wasn’t supposed to be worrying about anything?  They had to be kidding!

“I don’t hear you saying anything,” she noticed next.

Huh?  I pointed at the big pacifier in my mouth…with its perfect motion.

“Babies babble and talk to their toys.  I want to hear you babbling.  That pacifier will probably only help you sound more like a baby, so don’t let that stop you.  Now babble!”

But babbling like a baby was something so totally new to me that I had no idea what to do, which of course gave me something to do that I was already familiar with…rolling around on the floor in pain.

“Babble like a baby!” she ordered while the pain kept going.  “I don’t hear you yet,” she told me.

Despite the pain, despite the big plug in my mouth, I started trying to issue random sounds out of my mouth.  Luckily, the pain went away.  I was so grateful to have it gone that I laid there for a moment to recover.

“This isn’t nap time, it’s playtime.  You’re supposed to be playing!”

Once again I got hit by the pain, but only for a moment.  As soon as it ended, I went back to playing with that ramp and the balls with the faces on them.

“I don’t hear you,” she said.

I started issuing nonsense sounds from around that big pacifier between my lips.  At least when I was babbling I didn’t have to worry about how I was sucking on it.

“You’ve got other toys in there too,” she told me.  “Don’t let them feel lonely.”

I moved over and grabbed the spindle and started sticking the colorful rings on it, while I babbled away with total nonsense.

“Have you wet yet?” she asked.

I turned my head to look at her, then looked away.  How the heck was I supposed to worry about wetting myself if I was so worried about being murdered by her…toy?  I moved on and started pushing the buttons to make that electronic thing issue animal sounds, despite me issuing my own nonsense sounds.  What fun.  I was simply desperate to not get zapped again.

I turned my head and noticed her holding that cellphone up differently.  It took me a moment to realize she was filming me.  But what could I do about it?  If I didn’t keep doing what she wanted, I’d get hurt…bad!  Like it or not, I had to learn to play with those useless toys.  The alternative was simply too horrible to go through again.

I was in that play area with my toys for a while when she opened the gate and came in.  She stopped my play and did a thorough diaper check on me.  “You still haven’t wet!” she declared angrily.  She rolled me over onto my stomach and swatted my backside hard.  Then that pain erupted in my groin again and I rolled around on the floor in agony.  “Pee!  Or suffer,” she told me.

When the pain ended, I finally rolled myself to my knees.  I spread my knees apart, and did everything possible to pee, managing it far more easily than I imagined.

“See,” she said once I had finished.  “Now that wasn’t so difficult, was it.  But you better pee again pretty soon or you’re going to leak.  That diaper is even more wet now than it was.”  With a laugh, she left my play area and closed the gate.  “I don’t hear you playing,” she called as she walked away from me.

Baby babble.  Baby toys.  Act like a baby.  I just didn’t want to get hurt again.

 

My Funny Farm - Chapter 16 – Who Wants To Be a Baby?

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 16 – Who Wants To Be a Baby?

 

Position:  Baby. 

Job qualifications:  Must be willing to put up with the most embarrassing situations on the planet. 

Pay: Diapers changed multiple times per day.  Baby bottles of drinks shoved in your hand.  Fine dining of different baby foods provided for all meals. 

Job Perks: The opportunity to play with lots of useless toys while trapped inside a fenced-in area.  TV watching of the dumbest and worst cartoons ever made.  Enforced early bedtimes plus two naps every day.  Constantly changing embarrassing uniforms provided at no cost.

Applicants interested please apply as soon as possible.  The current baby in our situation is sick of his treatment and wants out.  Unfortunately for him, out is a direction that babies don’t understand.

Yeah, the battle was on, even though they didn’t realize that yet.  As I laid there in my crib drinking my first bottle of baby formula of the day, all I could think about was fighting back.  Holding back.  Not becoming the complete imbecile I knew they all wanted me to be.  Because hanging over my head was the knowledge that their real goal was to get me committed permanently to that behavioral center again…or maybe someplace worse.  In fact, someplace worse was the more likely possibility.  I hadn’t thought about that fact before.  So as far as I could see, I had more reason than ever to fight back and hold on to my sanity…even though that sanity included wanting more than ever to end my own life.

Emily hurried into my nursery while I was drinking my bottle and gave me a quick hug and a kiss.  “Love you baby,” she said happily.  “Have fun today.  Wish I could be here with you.”  And then she was gone.  Hurrying off to work.  You want the truth?  I liked it when she and Caitlin came in and showed me brief little bits of affection.  Who wouldn’t?  Those bits of love were precious to me.  I immediately went back to finishing my bottle and thinking about holding back as much as possible every time I needed to go.  Suck…out…suck…out.  I was so focused on my predicament that I never realized that the rhythm of my drinking was exactly the way both Emily and Caitlin wanted it.

Caitlin finally breezed back in just as I had finished drinking.  I briefly wondered how she had known so quickly that my bottle had run dry.

“Hi again baby,” she greeted me as she leaned over my crib and took the bottle from me with one hand, while her other hand stuck my pacifier back between my lips.  My mouth didn’t seem to ever be empty anymore.  Suck…out…suck…out….  She didn’t even have to say anything.  I just automatically did it.  She grabbed my hand and pulled me to a sitting position while still in my crib.  “It’s a special day for you today,” she practically sang to me.  And then she laughed.

A special day?  What the hell did that mean?  And why the hell was she so happy about everything?  Right now, all I was interested in was getting up on that changing table and getting that plug pulled out of my ass.  But of course, I suspected that breakfast had to come first.  Still, why the hell was she keeping me in my crib?

She disappeared into my closet for a moment then came back with a box.  What the hell was in it?  I had no idea.

“Something special for you today,” she told me as she set the box on the floor.  She bent down and pulled something out of it.  Something very padded and covered in childish cartoon characters.  I was about to ask what the hell it was, when she grabbed my right hand and then started pulling that thing onto my hand like a big fat glove.  I tried to pull my hand back, but she held it firmly.  “Hold still!” she ordered sternly.  “It’s going on you whether you like it or not.”

I held still and let her keep shoving that thing over my hand, I was too afraid of being put back into that behavioral center again to not do what she wanted.  The damn mitten had some kind of stiff thing in it and was narrow enough that it forced my fingers to stay straight out, while at the same time kept them stuck somewhat together.  She fastened the mitt firmly around my wrist and went to work on my left hand.  While she was busy there, I did everything possible to try and move my fingers inside that thing, but I couldn’t.  I couldn’t do anything with that hand at all.  It was actually worse than those bondage mittens that Jared and Emily had once used on me.  Not only did it keep my hand completely useless, but since it was so padded all over and my hand was stretched out straight inside, it was much bigger than those other things had been.  Caitlin finished fastening the second one and both my hands were reduced to complete uselessness.  I wanted to ask why, but that big pacifier in my mouth sort of kept me from asking anything.

But it seemed that Caitlin wasn’t done with me yet.  Not at all.  While I sat there trying to fathom those two big things covering my hands, she went back to her box and pulled something else out.  She grabbed one of my feet and began pulling some kind of padded bootie onto it.  Very quickly, my foot went in, and I was shocked to feel something inside on the sole of the thing.  In fact, there was a bunch of somethings all over the sole of the thing.  And whatever they were, they were hard and uncomfortable.  She fastened that bootie firmly to my foot, then put another bootie on my other foot.

“Okay baby,” she declared a bit too happily.  “Let’s get you down now.  She grabbed my hand and helped me slide off my crib, but the moment one of my feet hit the floor, those things inside that bootie felt like they were going to go right through my foot!  “Ow!” I yelled suddenly and sank down to my knees since I couldn’t stand on that foot.  It had hurt…and Caitlin was laughing.  I remembered then that Caitlin too had been interested in that BDSM stuff.  Was this part of that?

I experimented a bit with trying to get to my feet, but I quickly discovered that any attempt to do that at all only brought me intense pain.  I looked up at Caitlin, she was still laughing delightedly.  “We wanted to give you a chance to experience being more a real baby than usual.  Which means more helpless.  Since babies can’t walk and they don’t have much finger dexterity, neither do you now.  Now you can spend the day crawling everywhere just like a real baby, and you can enjoy having me help you with everything else.  Won’t that be fun?”

She had said it like she really expected me to enjoy it.  I already knew I was in for a nightmare of a day.

“Come on baby,” she said.  “Breakfast time.  Crawl out to the kitchen.”

Yeah.  Crawl out.  I had no choice but to crawl out.  I had no choice but to crawl everywhere.

Surprise!  I got baby cereal for breakfast again.  Actually, no surprise at all.  I got baby cereal for breakfast more often than not.  Caitlin grabbed me under my shoulders and lifted me up so I could sit in my chair at the table.  Then she literally sat there and spoon fed me my entire breakfast, including encouraging me to keep eating by making airplane sounds and train noises.  I could have done without both.  I could have done without the baby food.  I could have done without the damn things she had put on me, making my hands and feet useless.  And I could especially do without my entire life!  Why the hell couldn’t they just let me die?

After breakfast, Caitlin decided I was too heavy for her to lift up onto my changing table, so she changed me right on the floor of my nursery.  The best part, and the most painful part, was when she finally pulled that plug out of my ass.  Once I was diapered again, I was sent out to the living room to watch TV.  My normal schedule for the day had started.  I was just going to have to go through it all with no hands and no way to walk anywhere.  And then of course, only moments after I started watching that cartoon, and as always seemed to happen after having that plug removed from my ass, my bowels erupted, and I helplessly filled the back of my diaper…and it wasn’t even wet yet!  But yeah, I did wet it only moments later, and even though I had been planning on holding back all day, that wetting had been a bit more effortless than usual.  Now not only was I stuck crawling around all day, since they didn’t change those thick diapers of mine as often, I was going to be stuck in a stinky, messy diaper until after lunch.  Hours away!  Ugh!  I hated those plugs in my ass.

“Somebody made a stinkyyyy.”

I couldn’t believe that Caitlin would actually sing that little bit of news to me.  And why did she have to sound so happy about it?  I certainly wasn’t.  She delivered a bottle of that delicious vanilla flavored stuff to me, that I now knew from finding cases of it in the pantry was some kind of vitamin supplement drink.  Something that was actually very good for me to be drinking since it would help to keep me healthy…well, my body.  My mind of course was another matter.

When playtime came, I crawled my stinky butt into my play area where Caitlin once again joined me and actually played with me…and my toys.  Was she trying to teach me how to play with those dumb things?  Trust me, it wasn’t working.  Still at least one of us seemed to be enjoying it.  Hint…it wasn’t me.

As I figured, I didn’t stop stinking up the house until after lunch, and by that time Caitlin had a huge mess to clean up from my bottom.  All I could think about it was that it served her right to have to deal with it since she had caused it in the first place.  From there, it was more crawling around for everything I did.

With no usable hands, Caitlin didn’t even try to sit me down in front of the computer.  We spent more time playing together with the toys instead.  Or rather, she did most of the playing, although I was “made” to try and play with them too.  Even if I was interested in doing anything with those stupid toys, what could I do with no hands?  It boggled my…baby…mind.

When naptime came, she struggled like crazy to get me back in my crib, and believe it or not, managed it.  I was actually glad.  I’d rather sleep there than on the hard floor.  I’d already had too much of that hard floor from crawling around on it all day.

Eventually, Emily came home, and she breezed in like she couldn’t wait to get there.  Why?  “How’s the baby doing today?” she asked the moment she got into my nursery where Caitlin was lying on the floor in front of me playing with my toys.

“We’re having a good time.  Aren’t we?” she replied as she looked in my direction.

If she enjoyed playing with my toys so much, why was she insisting they were for me?  Okay.  Five minutes later, things got far more weird than they already had been all day.  Both Caitlin and Emily were lying on the floor of my play area, playing with my toys…together!  All I could do was sit there and watch those two acting like total…uh…babies together.  Besides, what else could I do with no hands.  They, for some reason, never seemed to notice that little fact.  So far, it looked to me like their little baby therapy was working on the wrong people.  Not that I minded that at all.  I had to wonder though if they both would prefer to be in my diapers instead of me.  Now that I would have loved to see!

It wasn’t too much longer before Bill came home and both women must have figured out that it wouldn’t look good to him to see what they were doing (instead of me).  They both got up and headed to the kitchen to make dinner.  I just looked at them both leaving my nursery behind, glad to see them go, even though I had been highly amused seeing how much they seemed to enjoy playing with all my toys.

At dinner time, I crawled my wet diapered butt into the kitchen where Emily had Bill help lift me up into my chair.  Hooray!  I got real food to eat instead of baby food.  The only problem was those huge mitts on my hands.  Caitlin once again fed me my dinner while she was eating hers…until the front doorbell rang.  I panicked.  Who the hell would ring our doorbell?  Most of the family always just barged right into the house, coming in through the garage.

Emily went to answer it, and she came back a minute later with Doctor Clive.  Caitlin got up from the table and the three of them wandered out of the kitchen in the direction of my nursery.  Five minutes later, Doctor Clive was gone and Emily and Caitlin returned to the table.

“She loved the new nursery,” Caitlin gushed happily.

“Yeah,” Emily agreed.  “She said it was like a dream room, and she thinks we’re doing a great job with…you know who over here.”

I was guessing she was talking about me.  And then I remembered who it was that seemed to enjoy playing with all those toys so much.

“Here comes the choo-choo train,” Caitlin said as she held up my spoon loaded with food and started bringing it towards my mouth.  “Choo-choo-choo….  Open up the tunnel.”

Yeah, I was starting to get convinced that all their baby treatment was working on them instead of me.  A few more days and maybe they really would be wearing my diapers instead of me.  I could only hope.

 

My Funny Farm - Chapter 15 – The Fantasy of Reality – Part 2 of 2

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 15 – The Fantasy of Reality – Part 2 of 2

 

Caitlin finally came back into the room to get me.  She paused partway across the room though and reached down to pick my pacifier up from the floor.  She opened the gate and came into my play area and stuffed the pacifier back in my mouth.  “Suck…out…suck…out…suck.”  She was absolutely relentless when it came to making me suck that thing the way she wanted.  She finally stopped her coaching and grabbed my hand, pulling me out of that play area and out of the room.

“I suggest you start learning to accept how you’re going to be dressed and treated in public from now on,” she told me as she dragged me out toward the garage, “because this is what we’ve all planned for you, whether you like it or not, and we already know you’d rather not.”  She stopped walking and turned to me with a sly smile on her face.  “Of course, we also know that deep down inside, you’re probably loving it.”  She stuck her finger into my chest.  “So get used to it.  It’s happening.  Right now in fact!  Now go.  Get in the car.  And remember, the backseat from now on.  I’ll buckle your seatbelt for you.”

I went, but trust me, it was reluctantly.

True to her word, and like she had done last time, I sat in the backseat, and she buckled my seatbelt for me.  Then she looked me in the face.  “Suck…out…suck…out.”  She watched me for a moment to make sure the motion of my pacifier was up to what she expected of me.  While she got the car started and pulled out of the driveway, I sat there in the super cushioning of my diaper and stared down at my bare legs.  Bare legs!  With an emphasis on bare!  I knew I had to look ridiculous.  And she wanted to take me out in public this way?  How was I supposed to handle that?

My hair had once again fallen down in front of my shoulders framing my view of my legs and blocking part of the view out the window.  It was all so surreal that I didn’t know what to do.  All I knew was that the panic was building up inside me.  And then I realized I was peeing…without knowing I had to go.  It wasn’t a lot that came out, but it was enough to make me notice.  And then I realized that I was still sucking my pacifier with that same rhythm that Caitlin and Emily always demanded.  I quickly stopped that and just kept it there in my mouth, as if it was a way to protest and fight back against the way they were forcing me to act.

I stared down at my bare legs in that too short dress until I realized she had pulled into the parking lot and was parking the car.  The strangest thing though was that I was suddenly wishing I could to pee again, just for some little way to give me a bit of relief.  But I felt no need to pee at all anymore.  I had already done that…without trying.

Caitlin came around, opened my car door and unbuckled my seatbelt.  She literally grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the car.  I went, but not willingly.  She stopped me right there.  “Suck…out…suck…out…”  She watched me for a while, getting the rhythm going again.  “Now keep doing that!  I shouldn’t have to remind you at all about that anymore.”  With that, she took my hand and dragged me from the car into the doctor’s office.

The receptionist certainly got a kick out of the way I looked.  There was absolutely no doubt about that.  She didn’t say anything, but I could see she was doing all she could to not laugh out loud.  Caitlin and I took some seats in the waiting room…and waited.  Finally, my name was called and I left Caitlin behind and headed into the doctor’s office for…a chat.  I pulled the plug from my mouth before I opened her door and went in.

“Hello Mr. Bryson,” she said with a very amused look on her face.  “Or should I call you little Miss Bryson today?”

“How about we don’t call me anything and just let me go home and kill myself instead.”

She chuckled.  I guess she thought it was funny.  It should have been perfectly obvious to her that I was serious.

I sat down and immediately asked the one biggest question on my mind.  “Would you really send me back to that behavioral center if I refused to do whatever they want?”

She considered that for only a short moment.  “I’m afraid so.  Everyone knows that’s where you belong.  I’m only allowing this as long as the family continues to provide all the extra therapy for you.”

“How is wearing a dress out in public any kind of therapy?  It’s ludicrous!”

“Ludicrous?  Perhaps,” she admitted.  “But maybe you should consider letting go completely of your old life and ideas and try to embrace some new ones instead.  And, from what I’ve been told, they’re ideas you have an interest in anyway.  Craig, as much as I hate to say this, you need to let go of the old you and become someone new for a while.”

“Why?  There’s nothing wrong with the old me.”

“If you’ll remember, the old you wants to commit suicide.  Which means that you don’t seem to like the old you very much.  You hate your life enough that you’re determined to end it.  Now you get a chance to be someone new.  Someone different.”

“But look at me!  Yeah, I’m different all right.  Ridiculously different!  But how is this supposed to help me?”

“Craig, think for a minute.  If you’re outside of yourself, then maybe you can see your old self better.  Sometimes it takes a completely different point of view in order for us to be able to examine our inner selves completely.  Your family is providing you with that new outer self.  Someone totally different than you used to be.  Now you’ve got the opportunity to look back at your old self and see that self in a completely different light.  Craig, you’ve got an opportunity here to learn a lot about yourself.”

“By dressing and acting like an idiot?”

“If that’s the way you want to think of it.  But think of it as an opportunity instead.  Take the time and immerse yourself in this new person so you can look back on your old life more objectively.”

“Look back on my old life?  All this new life is giving me so far is more stress and worries than I’ve ever had!  And I mean real stress!”

She nodded.  “Yes.  I can see that.  It’s going to take some time and effort though to get past all the embarrassments, so they no longer are any stress for you at all.  New things always take time to get used to.”

I shook my head.  “All I can see now is that I’ve got more reason than ever to want to kill myself.  But the truth is that’s not what I was talking about at all.”

“It wasn’t?”

“No.  But yes, you are right.  I was talking about the way they’re making me…live too.  In fact, that’s a lot of it.  But there’s something else going on that I found out about that has me stressed to high heaven now.”

“Oh?  What?”

“They’re plotting against me.  They’re all against me.  Their real goal is to get me so crazy that they can have me committed permanently somewhere for being completely incompetent.”

“Mr. Bryson, that’s ridiculous!  Of course they’re not.”

“Yes they are!  I know.  One of them told me.  She spilled the beans.  Maybe she thought my baby brain…that I don’t have…wouldn’t be able to understand what she was saying.  But trust me, I understood her perfectly.”

The doctor shook her head.  “And what did she tell you?”

“That they’re planning on making me into so much of an imbecile that they can have me committed permanently for being incompetent.”

“But why would they ever want to do such a thing?”

“Because she said it would give them opportunities.”

“Opportunities?  For what?

“That’s just it.  I don’t know.”

“And what do your son and daughter think about this?”

“I haven’t had a chance to tell them yet.  But I’m planning on it.”

“Mr. Bryson,” she said.  “I think this sudden persecution complex that you’re experiencing is nothing more than a reaction stemming from your reluctance to accept your therapy and the way they want you to live.”

“It is not!”

“I think it is.  Maybe you should consider that fact a bit more than you have.  And speaking of considering things, did you think about any of the things I asked you to think about last week?”

I was angry with her for not believing me.  I stared at her for a moment before I answered.  “Sort of,” I told her.

“Sort of?”

“I figured out why they get me up so early every day.  The answer was so simple I should have realized it before.”

“And what’s that?” she asked.

“It’s simply practical.  Caitlin and Emily have to go to work.  They need time to get me up, changed, fed, and ready before the babysitter comes.”

She nodded.  “That wasn’t so difficult to figure out at all then, was it.”

“No.  Not really.  Now if I could just figure out the rest of it.”

“As much as you might not think so, it’s important that your schedule is as consistent as possible every day.  Right now, you need as much consistency in your life as they can give you.  Which brings us to the next thing I asked you to think about last week, why there’s more playtime in your schedule than anything else.  Did you figure that one out yet?”

I shook my head.  “Not a clue!  It’s stupid.  Just like the dumb toys they give me.  I don’t know what to do with them.”

“And that,” she said, “may be your first clue  Think about it some more this week.  All that playtime you have is one of the most important things in your schedule.”

“Not as far as I’m concerned.  And you should see what they did to my room.  They created an entire nursery out of it, and the biggest center of attraction is a fenced-in play area for me.  A big useless area where I don’t play with all the even more useless toys they gave me.”

“Mm!” she grunted.  “They said they were going redo your room as soon as possible.  I really need to stop by there one day and take a look.  I’m way overdue for a visit to check up on your home life anyway.”

“Home life?  You mean my ridiculous life!  They’re making me do the most outrageous things possible, trying to turn me into a complete imbecile of a baby…strike that…a baby girl now!  And all of it is stupid!”

“Then Craig, I think you need to spend a bit more time thinking about all that.  All of it is important to your therapy to help you get well.  For instance, tell me, have you figured out yet why they want you to watch your porn just before you take a nap every afternoon?”

“Yeah, to make me realize what a pervert I am.  But if they’d just let me kill myself, nobody would have to worry about it.”

“Craig, I’m afraid that’s another thing you need to think about a bit harder.  There’s literally a reason for all of it.”

When I walked out of the doctor’s office, I wasn’t exactly a happy camper.  Caitlin wasn’t happy with me either when she saw my pacifier in my hand instead of in my mouth.  “Suck…out…suck…”  Yeah, my entire life sucked!

It sucked even harder when I realized a little while later that Caitlin was pulling into the parking lot of the grocery store.

“Don’t even try arguing with me, it won’t work!” Caitlin told me before she had even parked the car.  “We need groceries and we’re taking care of it now.”

Hearing that didn’t help matters, even though I already knew she was going to find some way to force me to go inside dressed the way I was.  Sure enough, two minutes later, she had unfastened my seatbelt and pulled me out of the car.  And yes, she held my hand all the way into the store, where she had me take a shopping cart and told me to make sure both my hands never left the handle.  Then she spent a minute staring me in the face just to make sure my pacifier motion was up to specs.  When she looked away though, it was only to pull my dress up and rub her hand all over my diaper to see how wet I was.

“You better not be holding back,” she told me.  “You know what awaits you at home if you are.”

I knew alright.  That damn plug in my ass.  That didn’t mean I was going to simply let go though.  She could stick that plug in me all she wanted.  Something told me it was coming anyway.  My intentions just then were to hold back as much and as long as I could.  Besides, I had another reason for it now.  I had to fight their desire to turn me into a complete imbecile.  There was no way I was going to get committed back to that behavioral center again, and this time for being incompetent.

As much of a fantasy life as all this was, I didn’t want anything at all to do with the reality of it.  Still, like it or not, I was now living the reality of that dream.  A life I knew now that I had to fight against and somehow win…without getting myself recommitted for being crazy.

Once again we wandered slowly around that store.  To say I felt totally embarrassed over the way I looked would be a huge understatement.  Somehow all that long hair partially blocking my view did little to hide the looks I saw from everyone around me.  And all the while, Caitlin had the gall to act like everything was normal.  How could she?  I simply wanted to die!  More than ever.

We were wandering down the third aisle of the store when one of the nearby shoppers looked to Caitlin.  “Excuse me,” she said politely.

“Yes?” Caitlin asked.

She pointed at me.  “Is there a reason he’s dressed like that?”

Caitlin looked at me for a moment before she reached out and pulled the pacifier from my mouth.  “Tell the nice lady why you’re dressed the way you are.  Tell her properly!”

I looked at her, bewildered for a moment, before it finally dawned on me how she expected me to answer.

“Baby, tell her, or you can expect to get punished as soon as we get home.”

I continued to look at Caitlin for a moment more.  I didn’t need any more punishments in my life, even though I knew they were coming.  I looked over at the woman.  Oh how I hated saying, “Because I’m nothing but a baby, and I need to behave like a baby.”

The woman seemed very surprised.

“He wasn’t exactly happy with being the oldest member of our family,” Caitlin explained.  “So we all decided he’d be better off being the baby of the family instead.”

“Baby?” she asked.

To which Caitlin grabbed me and pulled the skirt of my dress way up, fully exposing the diaper I was wearing underneath.  “Baby!” she confirmed.  She groped all around my diaper, doing an overly thorough diaper check, before letting go of my dress and sticking the pacifier back in my mouth.  She watched me intently for a moment until I resumed the rhythmic sucking she expected.

She turned to the woman.  “You’ll have to excuse him.  He’s still learning.  But I know he’ll be getting better in his new role very soon.”  She looked at me.  “Won’t you!” she said sternly.

I looked at her but didn’t say anything.  Did she realize we had opposite opinions on that?

We continued our shopping.  As much as I mentally wanted to pee, just for the strange relief it might bring me, I held on and fought the urge.  I had more reason to fight this life than ever.  During one of Caitlin’s many diaper checks, she angrily accused me of holding back.  I of course said nothing to that.  I was holding back, and for once I didn’t care if she knew it.  The diaper checks kept coming all through the store though.  That damn dress made doing them a bit too easy for her, but what could I do about it?  Nothing!

Eventually, we went through the checkout and Caitlin and I together loaded all that stuff into the car.

Guess what happened the moment we got home.  Right!  I got put up on the changing table, my diaper was pulled down, I got rolled over and firmly strapped down, and Caitlin stuck that darn big plug into my rear end, trying to break my asshole in the process because of the size of the thing.  It was such a relief when the widest part of it finally went in, and the entire thing got a lot more comfortable…which is what it wasn’t.  When she was done with me, she put me on the floor to play again while she went back to remove the groceries from the car and put them away.  But she was back soon after she left me with another baby bottle of juice for me to drink.

“We need to start giving you more of these,” she told me as she handed the thing to me.  “You’re not wetting enough.”

I didn’t tell her, but drinking more bottles was only going to give me more practice at holding back.

“And we need to give you more practice out in public!” she added before she walked off.

More practice in public?  That part didn’t sound good to me at all.  They might make me do all the dumb things they wanted, but I had a reason now to fight back.  I was not going to be committed again, this time for being an imbecile and unable to think for myself.

The battle was on!  They just didn’t know it yet.