Too Old to be
Young
By Karen Singer
“Four
hearts,” Beverly bid as the four ladies sat around the card table in Jackie’s
living room, playing Bridge.
The
women all glanced around the table.
Jackie threw her cards down. “I guess that makes me dummy,” she said as
she began arranging her cards so everyone could see them, and her usual
partner, Beverly, could use them. “Coffee
anyone?” she asked as she got up since she wouldn’t be doing anything else
until the next hand was dealt.
“I’ll
have another cup,” Lisa replied.
“I
could use a warmup,” Pamela, Lisa’s usual partner added.
“Me
too,” Beverly said as she reached for one of Jackie’s cards in front of her.
Jackie
went to the kitchen and came back with the coffee pot.
“I
can’t believe we’ve got a pervert like that…in our community!” Lisa complained.
“Not
only that,” Beverly said as she picked up the pile of cards she had just won,
“but he’s living right across the street from me.”
“I
just can’t get over it,” Pamela said as she threw a card out onto the
table. What can we do about it?”
“Nothing!”
Lisa told her. “Not a thing. He bought the house. He’s living here now.” She looked up at Jackie as she was pouring
Pamela another cup of coffee. “How do
you feel about it, Jackie? He’s living
right next door. You’re the one who
actually talked to him.”
Jackie
shrugged. “To be honest, I think I’m
finding it amusing.”
“Amusing!”
“Yes! Believe it or not, I woke up this morning…laughing! Most fun I’ve had in years.”
“Hm!”
Beverly grunted. “It is pretty funny.”
“It
is,” Pamela replied. “But it’s
also…disturbing.”
“For
sure!” Beverly agreed.
Jackie
carried the coffee pot back to the kitchen, then came back to the table to
watch the rest of the hand being played.
“You
actually laughed?” Pamela asked as they finished the hand.
“Believe
it or not, I was sleeping. Somewhat
anyway. Well, I was trying to
sleep. You know how it goes sometimes. But I kept thinking about what I saw and all
his outrageous fantasies, and I just couldn’t help it. It struck me as so funny, I burst out laughing. I gave up trying to sleep and got up. I haven’t been able to get him off my mind
since. And let me tell you, I’ve had
more than a few chuckles over it.”
“I
believe it,” Lisa said.
“But
what can we do about it?” Pamela asked again.
“I
don’t think there’s anything we can do about it,” Jackie replied. “But I’ve had a lot of fun thinking about
just that all day. Enough fun that I’m
thinking about talking to him about it again.”
“What
for?”
“To
see if he’s seriously interested in further exploring any of those fantasies of
his.”
“What?”
Beverly exclaimed.
Everyone
was looking at Jackie. Nobody was
thinking about cards anymore.
“Why?”
Lisa asked.
“I
don’t know,” Jackie replied. “I guess,
just because I found it so funny.”
“Just
what is it you’re thinking of doing?” Beverly asked.
“Like
I said, see if he’s interested in exploring his fantasies.”
“You
mean, you want to help him try to live some of those perverted things?” Lisa
asked.
“I’m
thinking about it,” Jackie told them.
“Why?”
Lisa asked again. “I just don’t get it.”
“What
would you get out of it?” Beverly asked.
“Are you planning on charging him money?”
“No,”
Jackie replied, dismissing that thought.
“Sex!”
Lisa said. “You’re looking for a man to
have sex with.”
“Not
with him!” Jackie replied. “You all know
that with all my female problems, penetrative sex hurts. I can’t do it.”
“But
I know for a fact that you still want some kind of sex,” Lisa told her. “You’ve talked about, I’ve talked about it,
we’ve all talked about it. You may not
be able to have penetrative sex, but oral sex is still on the table.”
“Not
with him!” Jackie replied, repulsed by the thought. “My vibrator and I are just fine, thank
you. No, if I have any kind of sex with
a man, oral or otherwise, I want a real man to do it with. Not someone like…him.”
“I
would think not,” Beverly said.
“Then
why?” Lisa asked.
“I’m
just not sure,” Jackie told her.
“Because
she’s bored!” Pamela stated.
“Isn’t that right?”
Jackie
thought about it, then nodded. “I hadn’t
figured it out myself yet, but that’s pretty much it. I’m bored.
I’m bored to death. And this is
the first thing in years to come along that’s even begun to spark my interest.”
“I
can’t believe it,” Beverly said with a shake of her head.
“Oh,
I don’t know,” Lisa replied. “I guess it
could be fun…in some ways.”
“Fun?”
Pamela asked. “How?”
“I
don’t know. Fun. I guess it all depends on what she does with
him.” She looked at Jackie. “What did you have in mind to do with him?”
“I
don’t know. I hadn’t thought that far
yet. I just met him yesterday.”
“What
were the fantasies you mentioned?” Lisa asked.
“Spell them out again.”
“He
only mentioned two,” Jackie told them.
“The
closet full of shoes,” Beverly said.
“But who wouldn’t want that?”
“But
a man?” Lisa laughed, which made them all start laughing. “Can you imagine his embarrassment if he had
to go to the store with no other choice but to have a pair of high sexy heels
to wear?” Her comment made them all
laugh harder than before.
“It
was the other thing that I can’t get over,” Pamela told them.
“The
diapers?” Beverly asked. “Totally
disturbing!”
“True,
but funny too,” Pamela said.
“That’s
where I’d probably start,” Jackie told them.
“He
wanted what?” Lisa asked. “To be kept in
them…”
“Forced
to be kept in them,” Jackie corrected her.
“For
how long?” Lisa asked.
“He
mentioned a couple of months, but I have no doubt that a week or two would
straighten him out pretty quick.”
“Why
just a week or two?” Beverly wondered.
“Because
the reality of it would sink in. He’d be
done,” Jackie told her.
“But
wait,” Lisa said. “You said he wants to
be forced to keep using them.
That’s what you said his fantasy is.
The shoes the same way.”
“Yes,”
Jackie agreed. “Which I guess would mean
more than just a few days.” She
shrugged. “Could be fun though.”
“Except
for one thing,” Pamela pointed out. “Eventually,
you’d get bored with it.”
Jackie
nodded. “As much as it seems interesting
right now, I’m seventy-four years old.
I’ve seen it all. Most things
anyway, until this. But Pam is right, no
doubt it would get old, and I’d be bored with it pretty quick and lose interest.”
It
was Lisa who said, “Not if you made an effort to keep it interesting.”
Every woman at the table looked at her.
--- §§§§§§§§§§ ---
“Hi
Jackie,” Lisa replied. “I just had a few
thoughts about what we were talking about last night. Are you still thinking about it?”
“Marginally,”
Jackie admitted. “I’m not sure if it’s
more than that.”
“Well,
if you do, I was just wondering, what if he doesn’t want to do something and
gives you trouble about it. If you’re
going to try and keep things interesting for you, then you’ve got to think
about that.”
“Yeah. You’re right.
That’s going to take some thought.
Thanks Lisa.”
“No
problem. See you tonight.”
“Yup. See you then.”
An
hour later, Jackie’s cellphone rang again.
This time it was Beverly calling.
“Hi
Bev,” Jackie said. “What’s up?”
“I
was just thinking about last night.”
“You
too?”
“If
you make him do something, how are you going to make sure he does it…when
you’re not there?”
“Good
question,” Jackie replied. “I’ll have to
think about it. See you tonight?”
“Of
course!”
Twenty
minutes later, Jackie’s phone rang again.
She wasn’t surprised to see Pamela calling. “Hey Pam,” Jackie said.
“Hi
Jackie,” Pamela replied. “After last
night, I’m having trouble getting a few things off my mind.”
“Yeah,”
Jackie agreed. “Lisa and Bev have
already called me this morning.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“No
problem, believe me. Look, I’ll call Bev
and Lisa, let’s meet at the community center an hour early tonight and we’ll
talk about it. I don’t know that I’m
going to do anything at all. And it
would be a big stretch of the imagination if he really did go along with
it. So he’s got his fantasies, and my
fantasy right now is to be amused by something…which, right now, I am. So before the Bridge game tonight, we’ll all
get together and talk. How’s that
sound?”
“Sounds good to me,” Pam replied. “See you tonight.
--- §§§§§§§§§§ ---
It
was an hour before Bridge was supposed to start when they met. That early, there were almost no other
players in the room. They all sat at a
table and discussed problems and strategies, not for Bridge, but for Jim’s
fantasies. In the end, it was decided
that more than a little research was needed.
They each agreed to try and find some workable solutions for the
concerns they had brought up.
As far as Jackie was concerned, even though it wasn’t very likely that she was going to be doing anything at all with her new neighbor, for once, she had something new and interesting to think about for a little while.
--- §§§§§§§§§§ ---
“I
don’t know why we’re even thinking about this stuff, let along looking at
things like this,” Beverly said at one point.
“He’d never do it!”
“Of
course not!” Pamela agreed. “But I can’t
tell you how much fun I had looking at some of this stuff today. I had no idea how much junk like this
was out there.”
“Yeah!”
Jackie replied. “I felt like I was
looking at pornography all day, and all I was doing was going to legitimate
company websites.”
“You
were looking at porn!” Lisa said.
“As far as I’m concerned, all of this is porn.”
“Yeah,
but at least it brought us a few laughs,” Pam replied.
“True!”
Lisa agreed and they all laughed again.
“Okay,”
Lisa said. “Since this is all just for
fun anyway, what would be the next thing we’d have to do?”
It
was Pamela who said, “Now we need a list.”
It
was much later that evening when they all quieted down. They had been having such a good time that
none of them realized how much time they had spent. Pamela looked across the table at
Jackie. “We’ve all been going under the
assumption that this is all just in fun.
He’d never agree to any of it.
And if he did…” She shook her
head and laughed. “He’d deserve it!”
“He
already deserves it!” Beverly pointed out.
“A pervert like that…living right across the street!”
Pam
looked over at Jackie. “You talked to
him. It was your idea. We’ve simply had a good time thinking about
it with you.”
“A
great time,” Beverly agreed.
“Are
you going to talk to him, or at least bring it up with him?” Pam asked.
“I
doubt it,” Jackie replied with a shake of her head.
“Why
not?” Lisa said. “It’s been fun playing
with it. Maybe it would be fun to find
out what his reaction was when she actually posed the idea to him.” That thought earned a few more laughs, but
not for long.
Jackie
smiled. “You do have a point. I wonder how flabbergasted he’d be if I
suggested it to him.”
“But
what if he does agree?” Lisa posed.
“Yeah,”
Jackie said. “I guess there is that to
consider, but I don’t see it happening.”
“None
of us do,” Pamela replied. “But Lisa does
have a point. What if he actually agrees? What if he decides he wants it?”
They
all looked around the table, but the looks all ended on Jackie.
“Would
I want that kind of commitment?” Jackie asked.
“You
could always end it whenever you want,” Beverly reminded her.
“Yeah. And it would only last until I got tired of
it anyway,” Jackie stated.
“So
are you going to actually bring this up to him then?” Lisa asked. “After all the fun we’ve had talking about
it, I’m kind of dying to know how he reacts if you actually talked to him about
it.”
Jackie
thought about that, then smiled. “You’re
right. It would be fun to push his
buttons a little. I have no doubt that
just the thought of it would make him squirm.”
“And
he deserves it,” Beverly said. “The
pervert!”
“And
if he does actually decide to go along with it…” Jackie shrugged. “It would be something different for a
while.”
“So
you’re going to do it?” Lisa asked.
Jackie nodded. “Yeah. I might.”
--- §§§§§§§§§§ ---
2 comments:
Great addition, I am looking forward to see what happens. Thanks.
Karen, Beautiful work as always! Hope all is well.
Alana
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