To Muddle or Not To Muddle

Yesterday morning, the possibility suddenly existed that this adventure could be coming to an end this weekend, but last night things changed drastically. Not only will I have another week, but it’s possible that I may have up to three more weeks. We just don’t know. Where doctors and procedures are concerned, we can only take things a day at a time. The procedure the doctor was supposed to do two weeks ago will finally be done on Monday. But then he wants to wait ten days to two weeks and do another one. So my wife will remain gone to help out, and I’ll stay here – adventuring.

So now I’m once again faced with looking toward the future. Do I want to plan anything, or just keep muddling through as I have been? I just don’t know. Planning and setting rules is exciting, but muddling through is a whole lot easier.

One thing that’s occupying my mind more and more for the last few days is the possibility of some sexual relief. It has now been three full weeks since I’ve even been able to get more than a tiny bit hard – let alone cum. For someone who’s used to relieving himself every single day, this is a lifetime. But what do I want to do? Do I plan for some total relief in some humiliating way (no, I’m not going to do anything in public)? Or do I just take my diapers off and edge myself, letting my fluid drip out of me with no climax? Or do I just take my diapers off and play with myself, allowing me to finally get hard for a few minutes - with no fluid release allowed? Or do I remain sealed in my diapers as I have been - unable to get hard or even feel any kind of stimulation through the layers of thick wet material? I just don’t know. I only know that I’ve been thinking about it more and more – to the point where yesterday morning I was laying in bed, pushing hard with my hands to try to get some stimulation into that area of me. No luck I’m afraid, but it was an awful lot of fun trying.

I do know that this weekend I plan to listen to my hypnotic tapes at least twice a day, probably morning and evening. During the week, I only have time for once a day. During the week I don’t allow myself to pee freely in my diapers while I’m at work and I do allow myself the luxury of not messing in my diapers while I’m at work, but this weekend I won’t be able to do any of that, especially with the help of the hypnotic recordings. The way things have been going with those recordings, I figure this weekend should show me just how completely incontinent I can be. I just need to watch to see if any other baby behaviors pop up.

Saturday I have a lot of chores to do around the house – guy stuff – ugh! I dearly wish I could do it all in high heels, but safety says that that’s not a good idea. If I were a woman, I would still be faced with doing these chores and wearing heels would still be a bad idea. So I’ll just have to suffer through it and hope I finish as soon as possible. Then I can get back to feeling pretty again.

So I have at least one more week ahead of me and probably a lot more. What do I do? I just don’t know. So I guess I’ll muddle through it as best I can. (I think I’ll buy another dress).