My Funny Farm - Chapter 7 – Overwhelmed – Part 2 of 2

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 7 – Overwhelmed – Part 2 of 2

 

“Dad,” James said, bringing me back to the situation.  He looked down briefly at his papers then back at me.  “The first thing is that you’ll be going back to having sessions with Doctor Clive every Tuesday afternoon.  In addition, you’ll also be having sessions each week with me and another one with Ashley.  You’ll talk with me every Friday and Ashley on Sundays.”

“And here’s something you might want to keep in mind,” Ashley said.  “Other than in those sessions, every time anyone hears you say you want to die or commit suicide, it will result in punishments for you.  However, we want you to discuss those suicide issues during your sessions with us and Doctor Clive.  That’s the only time you’re going to be allowed to talk about wanting to kill yourself.”

As I searched for something to say about that, I suddenly saw that maybe there was some kind of therapy method to all this madness after all.  I wound up saying nothing about it.

“Just so you know,” James said.  “Not being honest with us when we talk will result in punishments for you.  But conversely, being honest and fully open with us will result in rewards instead.”

“Punishments?” I said, concerned.  “Rewards?”

“But beware!” Ashley added.  “Asking for rewards will get you punishments instead.  Those are our decisions, not yours!”

I was starting to get the picture that they were planning on being fairly strict about things.

“Dad,” James said.  “Just so you know, we’re also going to punish you just because one of us doesn’t think you’re acting babyish enough, and we’re going to be very liberal with the punishments until you learn.  But also remember, the more you behave like we want, the more rewards you get.”

“What kind of rewards?” I asked.  Ashley’s next statement though told me they were once again ignoring my question.

“Your status among us,” Ashley said, “will be that of a baby.  All the time.  Even when we don’t have you acting like a baby.”

“Or a sissy baby,” James added for clarification.  “Depending on our whims.”

“Right,” Ashley agreed.  “There will be times when you will be required to act more like an adult and do chores, or go shopping, or any other things we want, but you will still be considered a baby, and you will be treated as such as much as possible.”

That surprised me.  “Adult time?  Chores?”

Not necessarily every day,” Ashley continued, “but most days you will be expected to do some kind of easy chores that we decide on, but you will still be dressed and expected to behave like as much of a baby as possible.”

“Other than our talk sessions,” James added, “those chore times will probably be as close to being an adult as you’re ever allowed to get.”

“We expect you to learn to live, act, and think like a baby as much as possible,” Ashley explained.  “In some cases, we may even ask you to talk more like a baby as well.  We want to see you completely give up being an adult.  We also expect you to not just learn to play with the toys you are given, but to actually enjoy playing with them.”

“Toys?” I asked.

“Dad,” James said.  “In some cases, we won’t be telling you how we expect you to behave.  We’re going to want you to learn those things on your own.”

I wondered what that meant.  I didn’t ask since they seemed to be ignoring my questions.

“Don’t worry too much,” Ashley said.  “We don’t expect you to be able to behave fully like a baby the way we want right away, but I’m afraid we’re still going to punish you for not behaving like we want, just to teach you what we expect of you.”

She said don’t worry about it?  When they still planned on punishing me?  Hey, hadn’t they said I shouldn’t worry about anything at all?  Heck, I was already worried about whatever punishments they had in mind.

“You will of course be expected to use your diapers fully,” Ashley told me.  “And never even ask to use a toilet for anything.  Just asking for that will result in punishments.  And Dad, you don’t want to actually try to use one.  Trust me!”

That sounded ominous.  I didn’t get a chance to think more about it as James continued.

“We’re going to encourage you to use your diapers freely and not hold back in any way at all,” James said.  “If we suspect you’ve been holding back, we will enforce punishments.  If we can see that you’ve obviously not been holding back, then we will reward that behavior.”

Something told me I was going to have to see what they meant by rewards and punishments.  It was possible I might not care about their punishments or their rewards.

“Don’t ask to have your diapers changed,” Ashley said next.  “It could lead to increased time in dirty diapers.”

Okay, that was one I had already experienced, and it had led to diaper rash.  Hey, hadn’t that been one of the reasons the police had wanted to arrest them all?

“Another thing,” Ashley continued.  “You will be expected to get used to keeping a pacifier in your mouth all the time, and actually suck on it.  Not sucking might result in punishment.  Sucking might result in rewards.  Like I said, you’ll be expected to suck on it.”

I was wondering just how many of these rules they had come up with.  It was getting hard to keep track of them all.  Especially with my pill fogged brain.

“At least one meal a day for you will be nothing but baby food,” James told me.  “And that meal will change depending on what we want.  You have no choice in the matter.  You may even get all baby food some days, and it may not be for punishment, but to help remind you of your status.”

My status?  Baby.  That much had already been explained.

“I’m sure you won’t be surprised at all by this next one,” Ashley said.  “From now on, the only thing you’re going to be drinking from is baby bottles.”

Yeah, she was right.  In fact, I was holding one in my hands right now.  I stuck the nipple briefly in my mouth and took a swig.  Hm.  Orange juice.  And it tasted good.  Unlike the flavor of all the rules they were throwing at me.

“When you’re here at home,” James said next, “if we allow you to wear anything other than a diaper, it will most likely be something feminine or sissyish.  Like everything else, you’re not going to have a choice in the matter.”

Feminine?  Sissyish?  Weren’t they the same?  It was another cause for concern though.

“In fact,” Ashley said, “you’ll be expected to wear whatever we decide, even in public, and we decided that we’re going to do it, even if it embarrasses you to no end.  And of course, complaining or trying to change how you’re dressed will result in severe punishments.”

I know she said in public there.  And I was pretty sure she said they were planning on embarrassing me with it.  And they wanted me to relax?  Enjoy this?  It was sounding more and more like a nightmare!

“The last time,” James started, “we know that Emily and Jared kept you stuck in front of the TV to watch cartoons all the time.  You’re still going to get to watch them, but not like before.  From now on, you’re going to be limited to no more than four hours of TV a day, and that will be broken up between morning and afternoon sessions.  But let me be honest here, that four hours is only if you earn yourself some additional TV time.  On a normal day we’re going to limit it to only two hours, and we will decide what cartoons you watch.”

“Unless you’ve earned the right to watch something of your choice,” Ashley added.  “Otherwise, our cartoon choices are going to be the most babyish ones we can find.”

I quickly remembered that I had already come up with some favorites.  It sounded like I was going to have to earn the privilege of getting to watch them.

“I know you’re probably wondering about what kind of rewards and punishments we’ve come up with,” James said.  “I’m afraid we’re still working on the list, but here’s some of the rewards.”  He looked down and read from his paper.  “One.  Reducing or removal of pending punishments.  Two.  Vibrator applied by an adult to the point where they decide if you’ve been teased enough, or they actually allow you to have an orgasm.  And that’s up to whoever is using it on you.  Three.  Watch some of the cartoons you want, but no more than during the daily time allowed.  Four.  Increased adult time.”

That one quickly caught my attention, but he was moving on before I could ask about it.

“Five.  Computer time in half hour increments up to two hours a day.  And just so you know, we’re encouraging you to look at your favorite porn.  In fact, believe it or not, we’d prefer that you spend your time with it.”

Prefer it?  That was hard to believe.

“Six.  If you’ve been good enough, you can watch an adult TV show of your choice, but sports will require you to build up to three shows since they’re so long.”

Ugh!  Wouldn’t you know it.  The one thing I’d want to watch, and I’d have to earn it…a lot.  I briefly wondered what he meant by good enough.

“Seven.  And this one is one we’ve only been considering, just because I know you actually enjoy it so much.  If you’ve earned it, we’ll allow you no more than half an hour to go out and cut the grass if it needs it.”

“I like that!” I said quickly.

“I know,” he replied.  “It’s the only reason we’re…considering it.  It’s not in there yet though.  And don’t forget, you’re probably going to have to earn it by showing us just how good a baby you can be.”

He had to go and spoil it.

“Um…he said.  “We’ve got a few other things here that we’re going to consider to be rewards, that you may not think of that way.”

“What’s that mean?” I asked.

“Just three things for now,” he told me.  “Like I said, we haven’t really had a lot of time to put this together, but we’re working on it.  I have a feeling that this section will probably grow a bit before very long.”

I was tempted to ask what those items were, but I said nothing.  I already knew he was going to lay them on me.

“First,” he said.  “You get to wear nail polish, like it or not.”

I stared at him in disbelief.  Get to wear?  And that was supposed to be a reward?  I didn’t understand that one at all.

“Second, you get more girly clothes to wear.  We’ll be buying you some anyway, but you’ll get more new things.  And third, more baby toys to play with.  And like we said, we do expect you to not just play with them, but to enjoy playing with them.”

I had no doubt he was kidding.  In fact, he had to be kidding about all of it.  Something worried me though that he might not be kidding at all.

“Ash,” he said as he looked at Ashley.

“Oh,” she said.  “You want me to tell him all the bad stuff.  Figures!”

I was guessing she was going to let me know what punishments they had in store for me.

“Like James said earlier, we’re still coming up with things.  I already know this list isn’t complete yet.”

And I already knew I didn’t want to hear any of it.

“The first thing on the list of punishments for you is reducing or removal of some of your rewards.  The next thing is you’ll have to watch cartoons you don’t like.  Here’s one you’re already familiar with.  If you’ve been bad, we might remove the use of your hands for a day.”

Yeah, I remembered those darn bondage mitts well.

“The next thing on the list is to have some of your adult meals changed to baby food instead.”

That didn’t sound very appetizing.

“Another punishment might be to make you spend more time in your dirty diapers.”

I remembered they had already mentioned that, and I already wasn’t looking for to it…or to the diaper rash I would probably get.

“Or,” Ashley continued, “you might find yourself forced to crawl on your hands and knees for an entire day.”

Okay.  I wondered how bad that could be.  Better than some things I was sure.

“And I’m sorry to say this,” she continued, “if we don’t like some of the things that come out of your mouth, you will get your mouth washed out with soap.  So I suggest you watch carefully what you say from now on.”

They would actually try to do that to me?  Of course they would!  But the question was, what would they consider to be something they wouldn’t want to hear me say?

“We’ve also included the option to spank you whenever we deem necessary,” Ashley told me next.  “And if we do, I can guarantee we’ll make it hurt to the point where you’re red and sore for a while.”

Hey!  Didn’t that fall under the abuse category they were trying to avoid?  I didn’t mention that though.

“And finally,” Ashley said.  “You may be punished by having a butt plug shoved up your ass, or possibly an enema given to you.  Especially if you try to hold back or don’t mess your diapers every day like we want you to.”

Butt plug?  Enemas?  Neither of them sounded like fun.  In fact, none of their punishments sounded like fun.  Not to mention, this whole new way of life for me was nothing but a punishment that didn’t sound like fun, even though they seemed to think it would be for me.  They were nuts!  And I was the one who had been put into the funny farm, not them.

“I’m afraid that’s as far as we’ve gotten so far,” James told me.  “Like we said, we’re still working on it.”

It sounded like enough to me.  Too much!  So much that I was pretty much overwhelmed by it all.  My pill fogged brain couldn’t even remember everything they had told me.

“Dad,” Ashly said.  “I’m afraid there’s one other thing we need you to do.”

“And it’s important!” James added.

“What?” I asked.

“We need you to sign a consent form for all of this.”

I was flabbergasted.  “A what?”

“We don’t want to get sent to jail for nonconsent to any of it!” Ashley told me.

“But I didn’t press charges last time.  You’re family.  I can’t!”

“We just want to make sure,” James told me.  “And the form also officially says you want me to be the executor of your affairs.”

“All this,” Ashley said, “believe it or not, is for your benefit.  To help you.”

I shook my head.  I didn’t say it, but it was hard to believe.  “And if I don’t sign your consent?”

“Then we’ll take you right back to the behavioral center.  Immediately!” James told me.  “We’ve…got no choice.  We only managed to get you out of there with Doctor Clive’s help, and because she told the people there that we had a workable plan of therapy for you.”

I looked at him in disbelief.  It finally dawned on me fully.  “So it’s either the funny farm downtown or…this?” I said as I nodded toward the papers in his hand.

“Yes,” James confirmed.  “I’m afraid so.”

As much as I hated to believe it, it was no contest at all.  I had hated that behavioral center with a passion.  The damn drugs were still clouding my brain.  I wanted them gone and I did not want to go back to that place for anything in the world.  “I won’t go back there,” I told him.  “Like it or not, I’ll sign your paper and agree to this…lack of respect.  Instead of the city funny farm, since this is my home, I guess it’s now going to be…my funny farm.”