My Funny Farm - Chapter 3 – Ambushed – Part 3 of 3

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 3 – Ambushed – Part 3 of 3

 

Enough was enough!  When were they going to let me free?  When were they going to stop their silly games?  I couldn’t wait.  Angrily, I could do nothing but sit and fume, while my mouth tried to chew, or lick, or do anything to dislodge that big thing they had stuck there that I now suspected was probably shaped like a penis.  Whatever they had done to me, I was thoroughly stuck for now.  Come on people, enough was enough.

And then Ashley, my own dear daughter, added insult to injury by bringing a baby bottle full of milk out to my recliner.  She set the bottle on the end table next to me and unfastened the strap holding that big dildo in my mouth.

“Uh!” I grunted, glad to have the big thing gone.  I was about to say something else when she suddenly pushed the back of my recliner down, moving my position until I was almost horizontal.  She quickly grabbed the baby bottle and stuck the nipple in my mouth.  “Drink!” she ordered.

I got one brief taste of what was in that bottle, and I quickly forced my head to the side, removing the nipple in the process.  “What is that?” I asked.  “It’s terrible.”

“Baby formula,” she told me.  “And I’m sure it tastes bad.  But you better get used to it, because you’re going to be drinking a lot of it from now on.”

She shoved the bottle nipple back against my firmly closed lips.  “Take it!” she ordered sternly.

Damn it!  I didn’t want to.  That stuff tasted awful!  But after a moment of struggling vainly with her, the nipple was between my lips.

“You should have no trouble holding that bottle there with those things on your hands.  Now take it!”

Like it or not, my hands went to each side of the bottle and pressed against it.  Holding the thing as well as I could.

“Now start drinking,” she said again.  “And don’t you dare stop until it’s empty, or I’ll sit here and feed you not only this one bottle, but another one too.  So if you only want just one right now, then get busy and drink.  Otherwise, I’ll make good and sure you get to enjoy two.”

She stood there and watched until I figured out that the stuff tasted bad enough that drinking only one bottle of it was preferable to having to get through two of them.  With those stupid things on my hands, I barely managed to hold onto the bottle well enough to keep it in my mouth.  I had done a lot of nipple sucking lately, so the bottle didn’t give me much of a problem…if you didn’t count the taste, or having to drink from it at all.  Ashley finally nodded and walked away, leaving me like that.

When I finally finished the bottle, I threw the thing angrily to the floor.  After drinking that, my mouth tasted awful.  I wanted a drink of something else to clear it out, but I was afraid they might only give it to me in another baby bottle, and what they gave me might be more of that lousy formula.  How did real babies stand the stuff?  Yuck!

Nobody was around me just then, and for once I didn’t even have a pacifier in my mouth.  As far as I could see, I had a darn good excuse to not go find one those pacifiers and put it where they all thought they belonged.  Deciding to not say anything about it and hope for the best, I sat there, still laid back in my chair, and fumed angrily.  As far as I could see, sitting and fuming over my situation was about all I could do.  In fact, with my hands bound the way they were, and the way I was dressed, I couldn’t think of anything I could do…period!  I was practically helpless.  I could just kill them all.

My thoughts were quickly interrupted when Emily came up behind me, leaned over the back of my chair, and stuck something against my lips.  Before I knew it, I had a pacifier in my mouth again.  Ugh!  But I knew it was inevitable.

Emily left me alone to just lie back in my chair.  I was angry at all of them.  I wanted to kill all of them, maybe more than I wanted to kill myself.  As far as I could see, I now had more reason than ever to commit suicide.  In fact, it seemed like the absolute best course of action for me.  Killing myself was the only thing I could think about as I laid there.  And after what they had done to me, killing myself would not only solve my problem, it would serve them all right!  Not to mention, it would hopefully make them all very sorry for the way they were treating me.

The only problem was, the way they were treating me would make actually finding a way to kill myself more difficult than ever, and suicide is never easy to begin with.  I could only lay there and fume about everything…in my entire life.

It was only a short while later when I noticed it.  The one thing that hadn’t even crossed my mind yet, since I had been so focused on my anger over everyone else.  It was the first notice my body was giving me that I would need to pee soon.  Damn it all!  Something told me that bottle they had made me drink hadn’t helped this situation at all.  What was I supposed to do about it?  Yeah, I already knew what they wanted me to do, they had explained that much to me pretty quickly.  But that didn’t mean that I wanted to do that.  It didn’t mean I was going to lie there and just wet myself.  No way!  Forget it!

I knew I had a while yet before I really had to worry about it, so I used that time to try to figure out what I could do, other than soak myself like an infant.  I desperately rubbed those thick mitts on my hands against the front of my diaper, trying to dislodge the tapes.  Didn’t work.  I tried using those mitts to push the diaper down over my hips to get it off.  Didn’t work either.  I was getting very frustrated.  Worse, the more I thought about having to pee, the more I felt the urgency to pee.  But I refused to sit there and wet myself like an imbecile!

I finally got out of my chair and went to the kitchen where the ladies were still cleaning up and talking.

“Hi Baby,” Caitlin greeted me.  “How’s it going?”

How’s it going?  She had to be kidding!  I wanted to take the plug out of my mouth, and I started to try and grab it with my hands, but that didn’t last long.  With the damn thing still in my mouth I said, “I need to pee, and it’s getting pretty bad.  I need out of this stupid diaper.”  It’s very hard to talk clearly with a pacifier in your mouth, especially when you’re angry.

It was Ashley though that answered me.  “If your diaper is wet, that’s not your concern,” she said.  “If your diaper is messy, that’s not your concern.  That’s our concern.  You don’t need to worry about those things anymore.”

“I am not going to wet myself!”

“Fine, then don’t.  But I have no doubt that eventually something is going to happen inside that diaper.  And eventually, something else is going to happen there too.  I suggest you start getting used to it.  You can’t avoid it.”

“No!”

She chuckled.  “Go find something to occupy yourself with.  If you want, I’ll find some cartoons on TV for you.  But get out of here, we’re busy.”

“No!” I screamed despite the pacifier in my mouth.  “Get this damn thing off of me!”

Ashley chuckled again, reached out, and bopped me on the nose.  “You’re so cute when you’re angry.  Come on, I’ll put the TV on for you.”

I wasn’t the least bit interested in watching TV.  I was interested in getting that diaper off so I could use the toilet.  Of course, I was also interested in getting those damn things off my hands so I could use them again too.  In fact, if I could get my hands free, I’d be able to do practically anything again.  Despite myself, I followed Ashley out to the living room.

She pointed at the floor in front of the TV.  “Sit!” she said firmly.

“It isn’t TV that I want,” I told her, despite that damn pacifier distorting my words.

“I don’t care,” she told me.  “You’re not getting out of that diaper…or any other diaper.  Get used to it.  And get used to the fact that you’re going to be peeing and pooping in them…a lot!  Get used to how it’s going to feel.  And I suggest you start getting used to it all pretty fast, because nothing about it is going to change.  You asked for it, and now you’re stuck with it.”

“I didn’t ask for this!” I argued.

“Didn’t you?  It sure seemed like it to me,” she countered.  “Not to mention, treating you like this will make it easier for all of us to make sure you don’t go trying to kill yourself again…which I might point out you still keep insisting you want to do.  And we’re not going to let you.  Now park your backside on the floor and I’ll put some cartoons on for you.”

Ugh!  I was so angry.  Instead of the floor, I headed for my recliner.

“No!  Not there,” I heard her order.  I turned around.  She pointed at the floor.  “Here!  On the floor.  “You’re a baby now, get used to it.  Babies are better off on the floor.  Especially wet babies, like you’re going to be very soon.  The last thing we need is pee soaking all the furniture if that diaper leaks.  Other people have to sit in those chairs.  Your place is on the floor now…where you belong.  Now park it!”

I wanted to hit her, but I had no doubt it would do me no good, not to mention Jared and Emily would probably find some way to make my life even more miserable.  Besides, half the women in the house were watching what was going on closely.  I had no doubt they’d all side with Ashley in a heartbeat.  I glared angrily at Ash for a moment, walked a step closer to where she had pointed, and sat.  On the floor.  Where I didn’t belong!

“Good,” she said before grabbing the remote and turning the TV on.  It took her a minute to find some cartoons that seemed childish enough for her, then she left me with one final command.  “Stay there!”

Who did she think she was, ordering me around like that?  Who did she think she was to treat me like this?  If I could figure out a way around it, I’d throw her out of here immediately.  If I could figure out a way to finally kill myself, I wouldn’t have to worry about any of it, including having to pee, which now that I was sitting and compressing my bladder, was starting to become an even bigger issue.

There were colorful shapes moving around on the TV screen and childish music and dialog coming from the TV speakers, but I ignored all of it.  My only thoughts were centered around trying to get those damn things off my hands, and trying to get out of that damn diaper, and anything else I could possibly do to accomplish both.  And overriding it all was the constant battle of knowing that if I didn’t figure it out soon, I was going to be wetting myself.  Something I’m pretty sure I hadn’t done since I was two or three years old.  And I was sixty-eight!

I desperately rubbed at each of those mitts with the other mitt, which still did nothing.  I started using those mitts to press hard against the front of my diaper, hoping the pressure would help keep me from wetting myself.  I squirmed around and desperately did anything I possibly could to keep from doing the one thing I didn’t want to do.  But like it or not, none of it worked.

As I squirmed and fussed and tried as hard as I could, the inevitable began to happen.  Like it or not, sitting right there on the floor, I felt myself losing the battle.  It began a little at a time, pee leaking out of me.  Such a strange feeling.  I could feel a little of it coming out.  I could feel the wetness of it as it washed itself around my genitals, tickling my skin as it slowly ran downward toward my padded bottom, which as I continued to lose the battle, began to feel wetter and wetter.  What an awful feeling.  And then I seemed to lose the rest of it all at once and I realized I was now peeing nonstop into my already somewhat wet diaper.  The flood of pee soaked my skin as it ran all around me and down, flooding the bottom of my diaper that I was sitting on.  It was an absolutely miserable feeling!

As they had said would happen, I had wet myself like an infant.  Like a baby.  Despite all my efforts to stop it.  I could just kill them all.  Although the only one I really wanted to kill, was me.

I sat there like that for a few minutes, doing my best to recover after all my failed efforts.  The wetness inside my diaper was obvious, but no longer as bad as it had been.  I was guessing the diaper was absorbing most of that awful pee in there now.  I still felt wet, just not dripping wet.  None the less, it still felt…miserable.  Especially to sit in.

Feeling defeated, I climbed to my feet and made my way into the kitchen.

“You’re supposed to be watching TV!” Ashley said the moment she spotted me.

“I’ve got a problem,” I tried to say as clearly as I could around that damn pacifier.

“What?” she asked, her eyes already going to my diaper.  Was she trying to suppress a laugh?

How could I say it?  I didn’t want to say it, but I had no choice but to force myself.  “I’m wet!” I announced angrily.

“Yes,” she replied.  “I can see that.  Go back and watch TV and enjoy it.  We’re still busy.”

“But I’m wet!” I argued.

“Baby,” she said, trying to sound irritated, despite the fact that I knew she wanted to laugh instead.  “I hope for your sake that you’re not asking to have someone change you.  We told you that’s not allowed.  You don’t worry about if you’re wet or messy.  That’s for us to worry about, not you.  You don’t worry about things like if you need your diaper changed or not.  That’s our job, not yours.  So don’t even think about asking anyone to change you.  Now get back in there and watch TV, or I’ll tell Jared that you’ve been bad, and we’ll see what kind of punishment he decides to give you.  And I have no doubt that it will be something painful.”

The message was clear, they weren’t going to let me out of my now soaked diaper.  I just hope they wouldn’t leave me in it too long.  Was it possible for someone my age to get diaper rash?  I had no doubt it was something I should be concerned about.  But how about them?  Were they concerned about things like that?  I could only hope.  Like it or not, I turned and headed back to the living room.

“And sit on the floor!” Ashly reminded me.

Why did they all have to be so cruel?  Just because I was tired of living without my wife?  Just because I wanted to die so I could be with her again?  Just so I could die so I wouldn’t feel so horribly depressed anymore?  They were all making my life far more miserable than it had been.  And in the process, they were making it even more difficult for me to do the one thing I now wanted to do more than ever.  Die!

How was I going to handle this situation?  I didn’t have a clue.  The colorful cartoons were still moving around on the TV screen.  The inane dialog was still coming from the TV speakers.  Like it or not, I sat my soggy bottom down on the floor in front of the TV set.  With little else to look at or do, I watched.  Despite myself, those cartoon characters held some of my interest, but most of my mind was still occupied with my situation, and how I could possibly get out of it.  I still didn’t have a clue.

Like it or not, I watched TV for a while, until all of a sudden, all the men came back in through the door.  All of them looked at me.  None of them spoke to me.

“Ready for dessert?” I heard Caitlin ask them.

They all headed for the kitchen, leaving me alone with the cartoons.  Bill came back and sat on the couch.  He had a small dessert plate with a slice of one of the pies on it.  Jared came back and headed straight for the remote control to the TV.  The cartoons disappeared and the football pregame show filled the screen instead.  A vast improvement I was happy about.  I just wasn’t happy about having to sit there, dressed as a baby, in front of all of them.  Jared then added insult to injury by sitting down in my recliner.  I could have clobbered him.

One by one, the men started coming back into the living room.  And then Emily was there in front of me, reaching down and pulling up on my arm.  “Come on baby,” she said.  “Let’s get you some yummy pie.”

That was the first good thing I had heard since all this started.  I just wasn’t sure how good it was.  I was looking forward to that pie, more so because of how bad my mouth still tasted after drinking that bottle of baby formula.

Holding my hand, Emily led me to the kitchen table, where she sat me down in one of the chairs.  It was Caitlin though who set my piece of pie down in front of me.  I stared at it.  “What’s this?” I asked around my stupid pacifier.  What I saw was a small plate full of mashed up…something.

Caitlin though seemed to ignore what I said.  Instead, she reached for the plug in my mouth and finally removed it, before grabbing a napkin and wiping all the slobber from my chin.  Then she left me like that.  How was I supposed to eat?  My hands were useless.

One by one, the ladies began sitting down at the table.  Caitlin came back and sat right next to me with her own piece of pie.  A beautifully cut, beautiful looking piece of pie.  Not like what was on my plate at all.  As the women talked, mostly ignoring me, I could do nothing but watch as they all began eating.  And then Caitlin took her fork and used it to grab some of the mashed-up mess on my plate, and then she held it up near my mouth.

“Choo-choo,” she said.  “Open wide for the train.”

She had to be kidding!  But I dutifully opened my mouth, and she shoved the messy pie into it, before going back to her own pie and the conversation.  At least the pie in my mouth tasted good.  Apple, I noticed.  One of my favorites.  Although any flavored pie would taste much better than that lousy baby formula.  Little by little, I got fed by her, while they all continued to eat and talk.  I could hear the football game starting on TV out in the living room.  In some ways I would rather be out there with the guys.  In truth though, I didn’t want to be either out there or here in the kitchen.  I wanted to go somewhere I could be by myself for a while.  But of course, being by myself had been a rare luxury for some time now, and I was guessing that luxury was going to become even more of a luxury for me if they were going to insist on keeping me in this state.

Eventually, Ashley and Emily left the table while the rest of the women continued to talk, and Caitlin finished feeding me my pie.  It was a few minutes before the two women came back.  “All done?” Ashley asked Caitlin.

“Just now,” Caitlin confirmed as she grabbed a towel and began wiping my mouth clean for me.  But then of course, she picked up that stupid pacifier and stuck it back where I didn’t want it.

Emily stood right next to me and grabbed my hand.  “Come on baby,” she said.

Now what?  Was she finally going to get me out of that wet diaper?  It was all I could think of.  With her holding my hand, she and Ashley led me into my bedroom.  I immediately noticed that the covers had been pulled back and someone had stuck some kind of protective pad on top of the exposed sheets.

“Okay, nap time baby,” Emily announced.

I was flabbergasted.  Nap time?  I was about to argue, but both Emily and Ashley pushed me backwards onto my king-sized bed, right on top of that protective pad.  Then Emily climbed on the bed with me and sat right on top of my body, holding me down.  Ashley grabbed one of my useless hands and slipped something over that hand and onto my wrist, then she pulled it tight.  I realized she had attached a rope to that arm.  Rope that was tied to the headboard.

“That should keep you there till you finish your nap,” Ashley told me.  Luckily, Emily got off me with one of her signature chuckles.

And then I saw Caitlin come into the room…with a baby bottle in her hands.  “Here you go,” she said as she handed the bottle to Emily.  Emily immediately pulled my pacifier out, then held the bottle nipple to my mouth.

“You know the drill,” Ashley said sternly.  “Hold that bottle and drink it.  All of it!”

The rope attached to my arm easily gave me enough freedom to do that much.  It just wouldn’t let me leave the bed to go far enough to matter.

The contents of the bottle surprised me.  I had already seen that it didn’t look like more baby formula.  As I drank it, it took me a moment to figure out what it was.  Apple juice.  I hadn’t had any in…many years.  Despite drinking it from a baby bottle, and despite the fact that I didn’t want anything to drink in the first place, it actually tasted pretty good.  Not at good as that piece of mashed-up apple pie I had just finished, but still pretty good.

The women stayed there until they made sure I was doing as they wanted.  Ashley leaned over me and hugged me while I was drinking.  “Enjoy your nap,” she said.  “I’ll see you in a few days.  Love you baby.”  And then she walked out, followed by Caitlin and Emily, who turned off the light, leaving me in semi-darkness.

I didn’t want a nap.  I didn’t want to be stuck in a wet diaper.  I didn’t want to  wear diapers period.  I didn’t want to have to suck on pacifiers or anything else.  I didn’t want any of it.

The only thing I wanted, was to die.  Was that too much to ask for?