My Funny Farm - Chapter 23 – Dreams of Money – Part 1 of 2

 

My Funny Farm

By Karen Singer

 

Chapter 23 – Dreams of Money – Part 1 of 2

 

What day was it?  Locked in my nearly constant routine, the days were starting to all blur together.  I had to think for a few minutes to figure it out.  I saw Doctor Clive every Tuesday, I saw James each Friday evening, and Ashley came to talk with me on Sundays.  And then there was the other part of my schedule.  Nichole came to take care of me whenever Caitlin had to be at work, which meant that she was there every Monday, Thursday, and Friday.

Those things were the only way I had of keeping track of what day it was.  Of course, everyone else would simply say, what does it matter?  You don’t need to worry about things like that.  Babies have no concept of what day of the week it is, and they certainly don’t care.  So you don’t need to care about it either.  But I did care.  It was simply a lifetime of ingrained habits.

I laid in my crib with my morning bottle in my mouth and thought about it.  Yesterday Caitlin had been home to take care of me.  The day before that we had been to see Doctor Clive and bought groceries.  Which had to mean that today was Thursday!  Hooray!  I had figured it out.  Or maybe not hooray.  Thursday meant that it was Nichol’s turn to watch me again.  And I still associated her with pain.  Pain that I dreaded.  Why was it that nobody believed any of the things I told them that she did to me?

Emily was there when my bottle was done to get me out of my crib and haul me off to the kitchen for breakfast.  One baby bib, one childish plastic baby bowl, one baby spoon, and a whole bunch of baby cereal.  Trust me, while everyone else was eating nothing but boxed cereal, I looked at their breakfast with total jealousy.

As the usual morning routine continued, I was more than aware that every moment brought me closer to the time when Nichole would be there, and everyone else would leave.  I was not looking forward to that time.  I think I might have mentioned before though that I was very aware of how inevitable it was.

As usual, I was sitting in front of the TV with my morning vitamin drink bottle when the cartoon I was watching was interrupted by the call of, “Morning all!”  Nichole had arrived!  Before long, Caitlin and Emily kissed me goodbye for the day, and I was alone in the house with nasty Nichole.  She stood over me and my bottle and said, “Aren’t you done with that thing yet?  Come on.  Drink up.  We’ve got things to do today.”

I wondered, and worried about what she meant by that.  She disappeared while I finished my bottle, and as I suspected, she reappeared with her big bag of medieval torture implements.  I noticed that she never brought the bag into the house while anyone else was there.  Maybe that was one of the reasons nobody ever believed me when I told them she was evil.  Just the sight of her carrying that bag into my nursery scared me to death.

When she came back to the living room, she grabbed my bottle from me and carried it back to the kitchen, despite the fact that I wasn’t done drinking it yet.  I stuck my pacifier in my mouth myself, mostly for the bit of comfort it might bring me against what I was afraid was going to come.

“Baby!” her voice lashed out.  “Why the hell aren’t you crawling your stinky ass into the nursery yet.  Get a move on!”

What had gotten into her today?  But I crawled toward my bedroom.  I was so much slower than she was that she passed me long before I got there.

She had me stand up, both to yank my tiny skirt off and to get up onto the changing table.  The skirt came off easily, but once it was gone, I took one look at that changing table with its waiting straps to hold me down, and another look at her big bag of torture devices, and I quickly decided I’d had enough.  “No!” I shouted angrily.  “No more!  You’re killing me!”

“Get your ass up on that table,” she yelled.

“No!  I won’t let you hurt me again.”

That’s the last thing I remember.  I’m pretty sure she said something, but I can’t be sure.  The next thing I knew, I was already on the changing table and my arms were bent back and trapped by the straps holding me down.  What had happened?  I had no clue.  I only knew that Nichole was now tying her piece of rope to my ankles.

“I’ve got a special surprise for you today baby,” Nichole told me as she pulled on the rope, pulling my legs way up over my head and finally tying it off in such a way that I couldn’t lower my legs, leaving my bare ass up in the air and exposed.  As she went back to her big shopping bag, I squirmed around trying to get loose, but as always, that was impossible.  “I’m moving you up today,” she told me happily when she came back.  “We’re going to stretch that poor ass of yours even wider than before.”

“No!  Don’t!” I tried to protest despite the plug in my mouth.

She laughed.  “Yes, and I will,” she laughed.  “Scream all you want, the more the better.  I want to hear it.  I want to remember every moment of what I do to ruin you.”  She slapped my ass hard with her hand.  I felt her spreading ice-cold lube up into my ass just before she said, “Here comes.  Open wide baby.  Here comes the choo-choo train.  Woo-ooo!”

With that, she started pushing that big thing into my ass.  I could tell immediately that whatever it was, was even bigger than the one she had used on me before.  I protested and yelled and squirmed, but there was nothing I could do to stop her.  Before long, I felt that thing sliding home in my ass much like the smaller one had done.  But my entire ass was hurting from being stretched so wide that the skin felt like it was burning.  “Oowww!”

My complaining and cries of pain earned me three hard slaps on my ass…with that big thing still in there.  “Stop your complaining,” she told me.  “It’s in there and it will stay in there until I go home.  All day.”  She chuckled.  “Your ass is going to be so big eventually that you’ll never stand a chance of holding anything back, ever again.”  She laughed again.  “And that’s on top of the fact that you can’t hold back anyway.”  Again, she laughed.  “Just like a baby!”

She finally lowered my legs, fastened the strap over them, and removed the rope.  With my legs down, I could feel that huge thing in my ass more than ever.  I fearfully watched as she went back to her shopping bag and grabbed something else.  Experience told me what that something else was.  Pain!  “No!” I cried again as she fastened her device to my cock and balls.  I squirmed to get away, but it did no good.

“She leaned over my head.  “I guess we better make sure it works,” she told me.

“No!” I protested.  But that meant nothing to her as she brought out her phone and hit the button, sending waves of intense pain though my body, especially my groin.

She laughed.  “I just love that!” she declared.

She might like it, but I didn’t.  That pain was killing me!

She left me and came back with a glass of water that she dumped into my fresh diaper.  “I know we don’t need to do this anymore,” she said, “but I get such a big kick out of the fact that even your fresh diapers are never dry.”  She laughed as she set the empty glass aside.  What had gotten into her today?  She was even more demented than ever.

Two minutes later, I was firmly diapered and put down onto the floor to crawl my way into my play area.  My ass was still sore and burning from that thing she had stuck in there.  She let me play by myself for a while before she eventually came back.  I noticed the baby bottle in her hand, even though I had just finished one out in the living room a few minutes earlier.

“Come on, baby,” she said as she held the gate open.  “Bottle time.”

Knowing there was no sense in resisting, I crawled my way out of my playpen towards the couch in the room.  A minute later, my head was in her lap and the nipple from that bottle was in my mouth.

“Now don’t fall asleep on me this time,” she told me.  “You need your nutrition.”

Yeah right!  But how much nutrition could an adult get from apple juice?  Some I guess.  Since it was a fruit juice, I guessed it had to be good for me.  I laid there and concentrated on sucking that stuff down.  And yes, it was relaxing.  Suck…out…suck…out…  The constant rhythm of my life.  Believe it or not, it relaxed me like nothing else.

“Nichole says to go night-night.”

 

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Nichole watched as he started automatically drinking again.  His nursing instinct was strong.  She found that to be funny since he was in reality an elderly man, not an infant.  “Suck and relax,” she coaxed him.  “Suck and relax.”  She let him finish the entire bottle before she pulled it away and stuck his pacifier in his mouth instead.  Again, the nursing instinct kicked in.  Very softly, she said, “You want to be a baby.  You love being a baby.  The more like a baby you are, the better.  You like to play with baby toys.  Other things and toys for older kids are of no interest to you.  You love the baby toys because you’re a baby.  And dollies are your favorite toys to play with.”

She gave him a brief moment, then said, “Suck and relax.  Suck and relax.”  A moment later she said, “From now on, anytime you talk or even think about peeing or messing, your mind is going to use the words pee-pee and poo-poo.  You will never even think about calling it anything else.  From now on, it’s always pee-pee and poo-poo.”

One by one, she began going down her list of commands that she had already instilled into his head.  A list she had memorized only because she…and the others…had been through it enough times to make sure that in the end it would contain everything they would need…and then some.

“You can no longer control or even feel whenever you need to go pee-pee or poo-poo….”  On and on she went, reminding him of the “right” way to count, and that he couldn’t go past ten.  He could no longer read words that were more than three letters, and finally the last one she had given him.  The one that was only in there because she decided she wanted it.  One the others didn’t know about, but she was sure they wouldn’t care.  Not that she cared if they liked it or not.  She was the one doing this to him, not them.  She reminded him that try as he might he would never be able to hump himself to an orgasm or even get hard.  Instead, he would have a spontaneous orgasm every time he messed his already soaked diapers, but since he was a baby, he would never know exactly what it was that had happened.  For some reason, she simply found that situation funny.

Finally, she reminded him of one final thing she had already told him, he would talk more about missing his wife and wanting to kill himself.  With that much done, she backed off for a few minutes.  “Suck and relax,” she whispered.  “Suck and relax.”

She let him soak up some relaxation to deepen his trance before she tackled the next thing on her list.  Something new, and perhaps the one single most important item of all.  And like everything else, she had to go about this very carefully.  “Baby,” she finally said.  “I want you to think about your son James.  I want you to picture him as a young boy, perhaps about ten or eleven years old.  Can you do that?”

Despite the pacifier plugging his lips, the word “Yes” managed to get out.

“Very good baby,” she replied.  “Now, whenever you think about him, I want you to picture him just like that, as a young boy.  Afterall, he is your son and that’s the best way to think of him.  As the boy you’ve always loved.  Right?”

“Yes,” he said again.

“Good.  Now baby,” she said.  “I want you to have some concerns about all your money.  I want you to realize that it doesn’t make sense for a young boy like that to be in charge of your money, does it.  You need an adult to do that.  Someone with more experience than a young child would have.  It’s silly for a young boy to try to do something so complicated.  So baby, listen carefully to this, from now on, you will feel much better about all your money if you had someone more qualified handling it.  Someone like Bill.  Bill is an accountant, remember?  He’s very good at handling people’s money, and you want him to handle yours for you too.  Baby, remember, you want Bill to handle all your money and affairs instead of James.  James is just a young boy.  Bill is an adult and a professional with money.  You feel much safer having Bill do it than James.  And I want you to tell everyone that as soon as they all get home.  Now baby, tell me.  Who is the best person to handle all your money, your young son James, or Bill, the professional?”

“Bill,” he told her.

“Very good baby.  Just lay there and think about that for a while.”

With that, she extricated herself from under him and went out to the kitchen to get another bottle for him.  A few minutes later, she had him sucking down yet another baby bottle of juice, making sure he would get plenty of experience in going pee-pee with no notice.

 

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All through my morning nap, I had something important on my mind.  Something that bothered me.  Something that I had done that was a big mistake.  I had allowed James to be the one handling all my financial affairs.  Why had I done that?  It was stupid.  James was my son.  My boy.  He was too young to be doing something like that, especially when we had a professional accountant living right here in the house – Bill!  I had been so dumb!

As I laid there, I decided I would rectify that mistake as soon as possible.  Tonight maybe.  In fact, definitely tonight!  Tonight, after everyone got home.  Maybe during dinner.  Yeah, that would be the perfect time.  Everyone would be there to witness that I wanted the change.  With that decision made, I felt much better about things, but I would feel better still once I had fixed the problem.

I was glad when Nichole finally came back in to release me from my prison…I mean my crib.  I noticed the glass in her hand.  One from the liquor cabinet.  She lowered my bars and said, “Go play!”  I watched her closely as I slid down from my crib to the floor.  Was she a bit tipsy?  No, she couldn’t have been.  Besides, it was still morning.  I crawled my way into my play area with her following me all the way.  She closed the gate behind me, as if that was supposed to lock me in.  “Have fun,” she wished me before she walked out of the room.

I was glad to see her leave.  So far, other than when she first changed my diaper, she hadn’t zapped me with her zapping thing, and the longer she stayed away, the less chance of that there was.  I looked around at my toys and smiled.  What should I play with?  I realized there was every chance that I could put the new dolly on the unicorn’s back, and the old dolly on the pink pigs back, and they could all race around the entire playpen.  I immediately got down to it.

I played with my toys for a little while, glad to be by myself in the nursery.  But she was back after a while.  She opened the gate and came all the way into my play area.  I noticed she was holding a book in her hand.  Was she going to read to me?  That wouldn’t be like her.

I sat there on the floor with my toys in front of me while I looked up at her.  After a moment, she knelt down next to me, but in getting down, she got a bit off balance and nearly fell.  She didn’t though.  “Hello baby,” she said.  I noticed the smell of liquor on her breath.  I couldn’t help but wonder how much she already had to drink.  “Let’s do something different today,” she told me.  She opened the book in her hand and held it out for me.  She pointed to the top of the page.  “Can you read this to me?  Please?” she asked…so sweetly.

I looked at the words in the book.  “Um…” I said as I tried to figure out what the fist word was.

“Can you find any words on that page you can read?” she asked me.

I let my eyes skip ahead.  I pointed to one of the words.  “I,” I said.  I found another word I recognized and pointed to it.  “And.”  A few words later, there was a third word.  “Was.”  I pushed the book away.  “I’m not interested,” I told her.  “If you want to read it, then go ahead.”

Instead of reading it to me though, she leaned forward and hugged me happily.  “Oh baby,” she said.  “You’re so precious!”

Yeah sure.  Who wanted to read that dumb book she had anyway.

“Come along baby,” she told me as she struggled to her feet.  “Lunchtime.”

Despite the fact that I knew I would be getting nothing but baby food to eat, I crawled my wet and stinky butt out of the play area and all the way into the kitchen.  Bib, plate, spoon, baby food.  My life.  Yuck!

 

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Nichole knew she shouldn’t, but she was simply having so much fun today.  He was responding to all her mental suggestions better than anyone had anticipated.  It was even better than all those con jobs she had pulled in college.  Consequently, she could see no reason not to have a few drinks like she had done back then too.  Besides, who would ever know?  Nobody!  Especially when she was done with him today.

She let him play for just a little while in his play area before she brought him out and started feeding him another bottle.  In minutes, she had him deeply into a trance and doing his best to drop even further as he continued to suck down the liquid.  This morning, she had gone over everything she had put into him already, so this time she took the time to remind him of just a few new things she was the most worried about, reducing his ability to read, and of course the biggest thing, he would want Bill to handle all his financial affairs from now on.  With that done, she felt free to start adding something new.  Something that the others thought was very important.

“Baby,” she said.  “Since you don’t like to read anymore, and in fact, you really can’t read much at all anymore, then there’s no reason for you to be able to write anything either.  So from now on I want you to completely forget how to write anything at all.  From now on you won’t be able to even sign your own name.  But then you’re a baby, why should you ever need to sign your name?  Babies don’t do things like that.”

She could just imagine how a baby would approach having to write something, and realized, they wouldn’t.  Ever!  “From now on,” she said, “you won’t even be able to remember how to hold a pen or pencil properly, and when you do pick one up, all you’ll be interested in doing is scribbling around on the page.  In fact, from now on, you much prefer to hold and color with crayons instead of using a pen or pencil.  But in truth, even crayons are a bit too old for a baby like you.  So that’s another thing you no longer have to worry about, writing.  You can forget about needing to write anything anymore.  It’s simply not anything you need to concern yourself with at all.  You can enjoy being a baby again.  You don’t need it.”

Since he was supposed to be living the life of a baby, she wondered if anyone would ever realize that writing anything was now beyond him.  She could just imagine someone asking him to sign his name, and watching him holding the pen wrong and scribbling around on the page instead.  Now that would be funny!

She got him another bottle, then while he was drinking it she did her usual reminding him that he would remember nothing of being hypnotized, but he would remember all the suggestions she had stuck into him.

She was going to do one more session with him that afternoon, but first, she needed another drink.  “Baby,” she said.  “Nichole says to wake up!  It’s time for your nap.”

 

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