Tuesday, February 26, 2013

The Bet - Chapter 60 (Tuesday – week 9 Part 6 of 6)

The Bet
By Karen Singer

Chapter 60 (Tuesday – week 9 Part 6 of 6)

      “You wanted to talk to me about something?” Mel asked.
Derek suddenly looked decidedly uncomfortable.  “Yeah.  I had lunch with Ray yesterday.  Actually, it was more of a liquid lunch, if you know what I mean.”
      “One of those!” Mel assured him. 
      “Yeah, well, it was more liquid for Ray than for me.  Earlier in the day, he had said some really dumb things to me and basically acted like an asshole.  I’m afraid it pissed me off quite a bit.  So for lunch, I went to the bar for a beer and a sandwich and he was in there ahead of me… already pretty far gone.”
      “So you two talked in the bar.”
     Derek nodded.  “Sort of.  Mostly, I talked.”
      “So… well…  In the course of things, he finally asked me about Sissy.  And… I’m not sure, because I don’t think you really ever mentioned how much you wanted to keep quiet about your bet, but I’m afraid I may have told him pretty much everything.”
     Derek nodded again.  “Everything!”
      “Including what this is all about in the first place, the incontinence thing for him?”
      “Afraid so,” Derek confirmed.
     Mel thought about that for a minute.  “So?  I don’t see where it can cause any harm at all.  It’s pretty much amazing that everyone doesn’t know the whole story already.  It’s really been only Sissy that has been trying to hide that part.  Did you tell him about what Robin’s been doing with him?”
      “That was the one thing I absolutely steered away from.  But he’s pretty smart.  He can probably piece things together – if he remembers any of it.  Like I said, he was already pretty far gone when I got there, and he was far worse by the time I told him that stuff.”
     Mel considered it.  “The only thing I might be concerned about is for Robin.  But as for Sissy, I just don’t see how Ray knowing it all can make any difference to anything.”
      “I just thought… when this thing is over and he goes back to work… the others… if they all know, might make life too difficult for him.”
     Mel shook her head.  “I don’t think it would be much more difficult than things have been for him already since we started this.” 
     Derek shook his head.  “I don’t know.  Right now everyone there is convinced that he wants to have a sex change.  They’re tolerating it pretty remarkably so far… if you ask me.  But something like his incontinence thing as you called it, that’s starting to get really out there.  Most people would find it totally disgusting.  His life at work is bound to be hell!”
      “Possibly,” Mel admitted.  “But it still doesn’t make any difference.  He’s going to be bound by my wishes so it won’t matter what the others think.”
      “If you win,” Derek added.
     She looked him straight in the eye.  “Am I detecting a sign that you somehow think he’s going to win this bet and not me?”
      “No!  Of course not!” Derek replied quickly.  “But… you have to admit, I think the chances are pretty good that it could go either way.  Besides, afterwards, no matter what, he does still have to go back to work.”  He saw Mel’s face suddenly look troubled.  “What?” he asked.
      “Nothing,” she replied. 
     They continued eating in silence.  Mel didn’t watch Derek very much as he ate because she couldn’t believe how much of his sandwich he was able to stuff in his mouth with each bite.  It was positively disturbing… yet very manly as well.  And she was way too tired tonight for any further stimulating activity.
      “I’m leaking!” Sissy’s voice called from his solitary corner.
     Mel glanced up from her meal and immediately checked the clock.  Two minutes early again.  Excellent!  “Get yourself out of that corner and go change,” she called back.  “And your next time limit has just started!”
      “When we’ve finished here,” Derek mumbled through a mouthful of sub sandwich, “and he’s done changing, any chance we can put him back in his corner again for a while?”
      “Why?” Mel asked.  “He’s got to clean the kitchen and I still have to get him his dinner.”
      “I just thought that you and I could… you know… snuggle a bit again for a while.”
     Mel shook her head.  “Not tonight.  I’m too tired.  I told you that earlier.”
      “You can’t blame a guy for trying,” Derek replied with a grin.  He finished stuffing the last of his sandwich into his mouth.  “I guess that’s my cue to leave then,” he said as he wadded up the paper. 
      “Leave?  Already?  And don’t bother cleaning anything up.  That’s Sissy’s job.”
     Derek left the wrapper he had balled up on the table.  “You said you were too tired.  And after working all last night like you did, I believe it.” 
      “If you stick around for a little while, I’m planning on letting Sissy have some fun playing with a dildo up his ass for a while.  I’m sure you’ll find it amusing and I know he’d just love to have you there to watch him and cheer him on.”
     The large sandwich Derek had just finished momentarily threatened to make him sick.  Or was that the image of what Mel had just suggested?  “I think I’ll pass!” he replied as he got up from the table. 
     Mel walked him to the door where he planted a small kiss on her cheek to say goodnight.  “How can you stand doing some of the things you do with him?” Derek asked.
     Mel smiled.  “How can I stand it?  To tell the truth, turns out… I love it!”
     Derek shook his head and walked out.  Mel headed to the kitchen where she started pulling baby food out of the cabinet for Sissy’s dinner.

     One big baby highchair, one big bib, one plate full of colorful baby mush, one tiny rubber-coated baby spoon, one baby bottle of semi-lousy tasting green tea, and one big baby.  Roll all of it together into one picture and that was Chad as he sat locked into his highchair eating his dinner.  Baby food!  The only food he would get.  The only food he was supposed to be able to eat for the entire week!  But of course, he had gotten lucky last night with the pizza and again earlier this morning when Andrea had brought him breakfast at Mel’s office.  He was certainly grateful.  But… being reduced to eating nothing but baby food had its own appeal as well.  At least for him it did.  As he shoved another miniscule amount of green goo into his mouth with the tiny little spoon held in his left fist, he thought about how strange that sounded.  Only a sissy like him could take pleasure in being forced to eat nothing but lousy tasting baby food all the time.  Only a sissy!
     He had gained another two minutes to his reward time for later this evening.  By his estimate that was a total of six minutes now for today alone.  And that didn’t even count what he had racked up yesterday – if she let him have that time as well.  And there was still a chance that he could gain even more time tonight!  No, not just a chance, he “would” gain more before the evening was over with!  But would he be able to have an orgasm from it?  He was hopeful, very hopeful!  But he had no real illusions about it.  Most likely it would only be a very pleasant exercise in futility for him.  But any “pleasant” exercise would be reward enough.
     Mel was sitting staring blankly at her TV set when she heard Sissy calling her to tell her he was done eating.  She realized she had been watching it, but she was so tired she had totally zoned out and didn’t have a clue as to what had happened in the program.  She forced herself to her feet and went back to the kitchen to release him.  “Get the kitchen cleaned up,” she told him as soon as he was released.  “Then do you have anything else to keep you busy tonight?”
     Chad had a feeling that if he didn’t have anything to stay busy with he would be sent back to his perch in the corner.  He curtseyed.  “Yes, Mistress.  It wouldn’t hurt to get some of the laundry done again.  And…”  He paused.
      “And what?”
      “It wouldn’t hurt to make some more tea as well.”  Curtsey.
     Mel smiled.  “Get to it.  Just stay busy.  And don’t forget your deadline!  That’s more important than anything else!”
     Curtsey.  “Yes Mistress.”  Curtsey.
     Chad kept busy while Mel went back to watching TV again.  At one point when he walked from the kitchen to the little laundry area, he thought he heard soft snoring coming from Mel even though she was sitting up and appeared to be watching the TV.  He did his best to stay out of her way.  He also did his best to keep drinking from his bottles so he could gain a little more reward time.  He figured that every minute would count!
     As he worked between the laundry and making more of the green tea he wasn’t exactly fond of, he was constantly aware of how wet his diaper kept getting – even though he couldn’t always feel himself peeing.  Eventually, he figured that it would have to start leaking soon.  He glanced at the clock, the deadline for getting any reward time was running out.  Leak!  Leak!  He drank furiously from his bottle again as he continued to watch the clock.  Leak!  Leak!  He kept feeling around the leg openings of his diaper for the faintest sign of a leak, but nothing!  Leak!  Leak!  And finally, with a disheartening tick, the clock went past his reward deadline.  Some diapers!
     Angrily, he kept sucking on his bottle.  He now had fifteen minutes to get his darn stubborn diaper leaking so he wouldn’t get punished – something he really didn’t want.  He just hoped this diaper wouldn’t be too stubborn!  Leak!  Leak!

      “Mistress, I’m leaking!”
     Mel snapped out of her semi-sleep, realizing that she had dozed a bit in her chair.  She didn’t know why she bothered to have the TV on.  She wasn’t watching it anyway.  It was a moment before she had the mental capability to check the clock.  Darn!  Sissy was very close to getting punished instead of rewarded.  He had less than five minutes left, but at least he had made it.  She pried herself out of the chair and headed to the kitchen where he was.  “That was starting to get close,” she said.  “I thought you were drinking plenty of bottles!”
     Curtsey.  “I did!” Chad confirmed.  “It’s just that some diapers are harder to get leaking than others.  He curtseyed again… and immediately grabbed for his leg as he felt a string of pee rushing down from the leg opening.  He quickly grabbed a paper towel to wipe it with.
     Mel almost laughed.  The stupid diaper had probably been overflowing, but the way it had been bunched up, the pee must have simply collected in the bottom – until now.  “At least you won’t get punished,” she replied with a straight face.  “Go get changed.  I started your next time period the minute you called me.”
     Chad curtseyed – a little bit before hurrying off to change his very leaky diaper.  Hopefully, the next one wouldn’t be so bad.  Half an hour later, he was working on his second bottle since changing and Mel was once again snoring softly in her chair. 
     Pee! Pee!  Leak!  Leak!  He was trying as desperately as he could for any reward time he could possibly get.  As the time marched forward, he noticed Mel stirring once in a while.  She got up and got her own coffee several times, but once she got settled in her chair again in front of the TV, she seemed to settle down and drift off to sleep before long… only to startle awake a short while later.  Chad just kept drinking his bottles and trying to get his diaper leaking. 
     As his next reward deadline approached, he was once again trying to do everything he could to make his diaper leak.  He was about to give up on it again when he felt a tiny bit of something again starting to run down his leg.  “I’m leaking!” he called triumphantly the moment he noticed it.
     Mel snapped awake again and glanced up at the clock.  One minute she realized.  He had leaked early again, but only by one minute.  Still, it was a good sign.  Yawning, she forced herself to her feet and stood there, staring back in the direction of the kitchen.  “I give up!” she said tiredly, more to herself than for Sissy’s sake.  “Sissy!” she called.  “Go protect the bed!  Let’s get this over with.”  She saw Sissy hurrying toward the bathroom to get a stack of diapers to use on the bed.  She followed slowly after him. 
     Chad started spreading out the diapers all over one side of the top of her bed – several layers deep!  Finally he was going to be able to make use of his reward time – and he was ready for it.  He had been looking forward to it for two days now!  He glanced back at Mel before removing his diaper. 
      “Hurry up!” Mel told him tiredly.  Get undressed and get up there.  I want to get this over with so I can go to bed!”
     Chad had his maid’s uniform off quickly.  He removed everything except his bra that helped to support his glued-on breast forms.  As he was doing that, Mel opened her drawer and laid out her collection of colorful didoes that she had bought a month ago along with some lube.  Before Chad was even fully ready, she glanced at the clock.  She really wanted to get this over with and out of the way so she could go to sleep!  “Since you’ve been so good, I’m going to allow you some time for yesterday as well.  As of one minute ago you had fifteen minutes.  That’s down to fourteen now.  Better get started!”  She stood back out of the way to watch.
     Chad was still removing his diaper as she said it.  He let it fall all the way to the floor and jumped up on her bed as fast as he could.  He reached over to her nightstand and grabbed the first toy he could grab – the one he had used last time – the one he knew best.  Grabbing the bottle of lubricant, he quickly smeared some over the length of the whole thing, then grabbed another dollop for his backside and smeared that right into his asshole, which forced a bit of pee to eject from his chastity device on the other side of him. 
     Still on his knees, he put the toy right up against his hole, and slowly started pressing it in.  Slowly, gradually, he savored the feel as it slid easily inside of him.  He enjoyed all the little moving sensations as the swirled shape of it reamed around his back hole.  All the way in, then a little faster, he pulled it most of the way out before shoving it back in again.  In… and out.  In… and out.  Gradually working it faster and faster.  But the position was difficult for him since he had to work by himself.  With the toy still up inside of him, he rolled over on his back, pulled his knees up to his chest which made his backside stick up straight in the air, and he went back to work.
     Mel almost laughed out loud at Sissy’s antics as he desperately worked the dildo in and out of his backside.  It was one thing to do this to him, but it was a whole different world of fun to watch when he had to do it to himself.  And Derek didn’t understand how she could possibly enjoy all this?  He should have stuck around to see it.  Sissy was being downright hilarious! 
     She could see his chastity device still locked over his tiny penis.  As far as she could tell, he was totally ignoring that part of him as he penetrated himself over and over again – trying to get the closest thing to an orgasm he was capable of.  And it looked like he wanted it pretty desperately as he shoved and pulled… shoved and pulled!  He was getting his whole body into it now, sliding around trying to get as much stimulation as possible.  It was obvious he was enjoying himself greatly, but it was just as obvious that once he had reached a certain point, no matter what he did, he couldn’t seem to gain any more pleasure.  Before long, she started to notice wetness on his stomach and legs as his chastity device continued to leek onto anything that happened to be in the way.  She was fairly certain that Sissy wasn’t even aware of it.  Or if he was, it certainly wasn’t bothering him in the least.
     With five minutes left, she watched as Sissy changed dildos and positions.  But as before, he still couldn’t get what he seemed to want so desperately.  She thought she knew what he was missing, but she wasn’t about to give it to him.  Not tonight at least.  Besides, she was having too much fun watching him get more and more frustrated as he tried and tried to get himself off through penetrating himself.  All to no avail.  In fact, she enjoyed watching him so much that she gave him an extra two minutes.  But finally she called, “Time!” Sissy was still moving the toy in and out of himself – but slower now.  She walked up to him and had to forcibly yank the thing out of him to get him to stop.  When she did, his body shuddered, and he collapsed in exhaustion on the bed… and another tiny spurt of pee leaked out of his chastity device. 
      “I hope you enjoyed that,” Mel told him, “because I sure did.”  She got no answer from him.  He was laying there practically panting from the exertion.  His stomach was wet from pee as well as parts of his legs.  She had no doubt that the diapers under him were fairly wet as well.  He must have peed an awful lot during his exercise… which was exactly what she wanted to happen! 
     She grabbed some baby wipes and cleaned him up.  Then she pinned him into three of the thickest cloth diapers she had before struggling to get his plastic panties over the bulk.  She finally stood back.  “Okay Sissy.  Clean this up quickly now and go home.  I need to go to bed!”
     Chad rolled off her bed and landed on his feet.  The extreme bulk of his diapers quickly made its presence known, but that was something he was very well used to.  It took him only a few minutes to get everything cleaned up enough for the night.  Then he went out and grabbed his purse and his diaper bag. 
     With his maid’s uniform draped over his arm and wearing only his super thick diapers, his bra, and his shoes, he curtseyed.  “Goodnight Mistress,” he said before curtseying one more time.
      “Goodnight Sissy,” she replied tiredly.  “Sleep tight.”
     She watched as he walked out and the door closed behind him.  But would that door be soon closing behind him forever?  She fervently prayed that wouldn’t be the case.  She had to win this bet!  As much as it might be very wrong, she didn’t want to see him walking out on her forever. 
     She almost laid down on her bed still in her clothes, but she made herself put a light nightgown on first.  She went around her apartment turning off all the lights.  The light on her nightstand went out last.
     Bed!  At last!  She breathed a big sigh of relief at being able to finally lay down and get a good night’s sleep.  Her mind drifted back to Sissy again.  She only had tomorrow and Thursday with him, then he would be free to gain back his control again – or try to.  She really hoped he wouldn’t make it.  She really hoped!  As her mind succumbed to the slumber she so desperately needed, she once again played back the images of Sissy trying so hard to have an orgasm.  So much fun.  So much fun.
      “Good night Sissy,” her mind spoke silently one more time.  “Sleep tight.”

     Ray nearly screamed as Gloria got off of him once again – just before he could have an orgasm.  She had been doing this to him all night long, going from one thing to the next, totally insatiable, totally in command, while he was to the point now where all he could do was to try to keep up with her.  But while she had enjoyed several climaxes already, she had purposely kept him from having even one.  The result was that he was going crazy… and now she was moving him into yet another strange position that he had never heard of. 
     Desperate for relief, he could only do as she suggested and assume whatever demented position she had dreamed up this time.  Now she was behind him, firmly hugging him.  He felt her pulling his aching penis painfully back between his legs, only to feel the head of it sliding once again into her moist slippery cunt... behind him.  And now she was moving in and out, trying to keep it inside of her.  She couldn’t move far, but it was more than enough to start sending him toward the edge again.  Would he finally get there?  It felt so good!  The pressure from the different direction felt… amazing!  He was breathing heavily!  He was about to scream… when she pulled totally off of him one more time. 
     He nearly did scream!  How long had they been at it tonight?  He had no idea.  The tiger was definitely on the prowl… and she seemed to be out for blood!

Friday, February 22, 2013

The Bet - Chapter 60 (Tuesday – week 9 Part 5 of 6)

The Bet
By Karen Singer

Chapter 60 (Tuesday – week 9 Part 5 of 6)

     Mel rolled over, but she only got part of the way before she met with an obstacle.  Coming partially awake, she realized it was the back of the couch.  No wonder she wasn’t as comfortable as she should be.  She rolled back again and opened her eyes… and saw that Sissy was gone.  Where was he?
     She was still terribly tired, but she forced herself to sit up.  She heard quick footsteps somewhere behind her that disappeared into the distance.  She forced herself to her feet, knowing that Sissy had just disappeared into the kitchen.  She only got part way there before she saw him hurrying toward her – carrying a fresh cup of coffee in his hands.  She couldn’t help it, as tired as she was, there was still that tingle of sexual excitement as he curtseyed and offered her the coffee.  She felt a wave of appreciation as well.  “Thank you Sissy,” she said as she took the mug and brought it to her lips.  So good!  So good!  His second little curtsey wasn’t lost on her either.  Yes, she could easily get very used to this… but was it right?
      “What have you been doing?” she asked.  “I see you got dressed again.”
     Curtsey.  “Yes, Mistress.  I was just trying to figure out what to make for dinner tonight.”  Curtsey.
     Dinner?  She looked at the clock.  Damn!  She had slept most of the afternoon!  And worse, because of that, she had neglected to keep him on his wetting deadline!  “How many diapers are you wearing?” she asked quickly.
     Curtsey.  “Just one Mistress.  And…”
      “What time did you put it on?” Mel asked quickly.
     Curtsey.  “Just over an hour ago.  But I saved my last two so you could see how wet they were when I changed them.  And… I was three minutes early the last time,” he added proudly before curtseying again.
     Mel stared at him for a moment.  He had put himself back on the schedule – without being made to do it… and he had actually tried to leak early again.  And evidently, he had been successful!  “You saved them?” she asked, finding it hard to believe.
     Chad curtseyed then hurried away.  He ran back again with two plastic bags in his hands.  He curtseyed again when he got back.  Holding the first bag open, he said, “This was the first one.  It took me an hour and forty three minutes to get this one leaking.  I was afraid I wouldn’t make it.”
     Mel had no doubt that he would have been worried about not making it… but even while she was sleeping?  Talk about being honest!  She realized he was holding open the second bag. 
      “I got this one leaking in an hour and twenty seven minutes,” he said somewhat proudly. 
     The thing that struck Mel the most, other than the odor coming from the bag, was what an odd thing it was that he seemed to be so proud of. 
      “Will I still get those three minutes of reward time tonight?” Chad asked hopefully… before curtseying again.
     Mel nodded.  “Yeah.  I guess so,” she replied.  She was still somewhat in shock over the fact that he had done what he did.
     Curtsey.  “And how about all the times I was early yesterday?” Chad asked before curtseying again.
      “And how much did that come to?” Mel asked.
     Curtsey.  “I don’t know,” Chad admitted.  “We were working so hard, I never really checked the clock.  But Andrea will know,” he reminded her.  Curtsey.
      “I don’t know,” Mel replied.  “I’ll have to think about it.  And I don’t want to call Andrea about it either to find out.  She’s probably sleeping,” she added, thinking that she herself would like to do nothing better than to go back to bed.  But at this time in the afternoon, she would do better to stay up for a while and simply call it an early night.  But there was also Sissy to consider… and his training.  “So you’re getting ready to make dinner?” she asked.  As she asked it, she realized that she was hungry.
     Curtsey.  “Yes Mistress.  I was just trying to figure out what to make.  What would you like?”  Curtsey.
     But Mel had no idea what she wanted to eat.  “Surprise me,” she said rather flatly.  She watched as he curtseyed again before hurrying back to the kitchen.  Not knowing what else to do with herself, she followed.  She was a bit surprised to see a bunch of empty baby food jars out on the counter.  “What are these?” she asked between sips of her coffee.
      Curtsey.  “They’re from my lunch,” Chad replied.  “I left them there so you could see what I ate.”  Curtsey.
     Mel nodded.  “Good!” she replied a bit shaken by what he had done again.  She turned her attention quickly back to Sissy as he let out a rather disturbed sounding grunt.  The look of distress on his face concerned her for a moment until she realized what was happening – in the back of his diaper.  “Go home and shower if you want,” she told him as she looked at the clock.  “But your next time period has just started.”  Purposely she turned away from him and carried her coffee out to the living room where she sat in one of her chairs to enjoy it.  She watched as Sissy hurriedly left her apartment to get cleaned up.
     He was being so good!  He had done everything perfectly… without her telling him to.  Why?  He had the perfect opportunity to cheat… or at least get away with something.  And he had to know that she wouldn’t punish him for it this time.  Yet he didn’t cheat!  And she realized that she was actually grateful that he hadn’t.  Somehow, despite her not ordering him to, he had stayed on his strict regimen… in every way!  He even ate the baby food for lunch!  Why?
     She couldn’t help but remember how all night long he had proven how smart he was.  And something in her associated that with having a little bit to do with his self-respect.  But now he was purposely doing things that were just the opposite.  Things that would do anything but give him self-respect.  He wanted self-respect?  But at the same time, he was doing everything to throw it all away!  Why? 
     The word sissy popped into her brain.  He wanted the self-respect, but he needed the humiliation.  Want… versus need.  It was like there were two halves of him that were constantly at war with each other.  She supposed that before their bet started, his need for the humiliation always took a back seat to everything else.  But now, under the terms of their bet… a fantasy life for him… it was all turned around backwards.  Everything else came second to the humiliation that he craved.  But even still, in the midst of this humiliating life he was currently living, he still yearned for the normal aspects of his old life.  Self-respect, friends, and a life.  But when living his old normal life, he yearned for nothing more than diapers, humiliation, and subjugation.  Talk about a complicated psyche!  Gloria would probably have a field day with him… if she let her.
     Her thoughts turned to her own dreams.  They were crazy dreams… only because she could have anything she wanted – if she would just spend the money and buy it.  But it had been only since Sissy came into her life that she had started moving seriously forward toward making them a reality.  Only since Sissy. 
     She wanted a house.  A big fancy house.  She could easily buy a dozen without blinking an eye.  And a staff to take care of them.  But she hadn’t even considered buying a house… not till Sissy.  She smiled.  His brilliant mind would have no trouble managing the everyday necessities of taking care of a nice mansion.  He could probably do it in his sleep!  If she won the bet! 
     But the terms of his continued service were only for one year.  What then?  What would she do after that?  She supposed that she would be forced to hire others to take care of her home then.  A major pain.  And she really didn’t like strangers going in and out of her house all the time.  Despite growing up with that kind of environment, it felt more like she was living in a hotel… not her “private” home.  She would lack the privacy she really liked.
     But Sissy…  Having Sissy there to take care of her needs somehow felt different to her.  Very different.  She wanted him there… with her.  And she wanted him there badly! 
     So how could she overcome his weird warped needs?  Needs that were in direct opposition to each other.  She still didn’t have a clue.  But that thought made her remember one more thing.  Was it really right for her to do to him what she was contemplating?  Was it right? 
     He was a sissy!  But he still had a very good brain in his head.  And one more troubling thought forced itself upon her.  Did that brilliant mind of his somehow know for sure that he would win?  That was the basis of their bet!  It was a troubling thought!
     The sound of her phone ringing snapped her out of her numb-minded reverie!  Saved by the bell!  She hurried to answer it.  “Hello?” she said breathlessly. 
      “I hope I didn’t wake you,” Derek’s voice replied.
      “No, I was just sitting with a cup of coffee.”
      “So how did everything go?  Did you find the proof you needed?”
      “Oh yeah!” Mel replied.  “It was incredibly well hidden, but we dug it out.”
      “So you managed to stop the deal from going through?”
      “For now.  I’m sure it will still happen.  They just have to go back and rewrite everything.  Actually, I expect that Sunshine will just decide to go the easy route and buy them out forcefully instead.”
      “I’m surprised they didn’t do that in the first place,” Derek’s voice replied.
      “It would have cost them a lot more money,” Mel explained.
      “So now that you’re finished, what are you doing tonight – besides keeping an eye on Sissy.”
      “Sleeping!  I took a nap this afternoon, but I’m still exhausted.”
      “Too exhausted for any company?”
     Mel stopped to think about that for a minute.  “You can come, but don’t expect me to be up for anything much more than some easy conversation.  And I mean that!”
     Derek laughed.  “Good enough.  I want to talk to you about something anyway.”
      “I’ll let you know when I get there.”
      “You’re coming now?”
      “Do you need me to wait?”
      “I guess not.  I’ll tell Sissy to make you something to eat as well.  I don’t even know what he’s planning to make me for dinner yet.”
      “Don’t bother,” Derek replied.  “I’ll bring my own dinner.”
      “That sounds stupid.”
      “It’s okay,” Derek replied.  “I’m not in the mood for a six-course meal.”
     Me’s foggy brain wasn’t sure what to think about that.  “Okay,” she replied.  “See you when you get here.”
     She had to wait another ten minutes until Sissy returned.  “Derek’s coming,” she told him as he was heading straight for the kitchen.  “But he’s bringing his own dinner, so don’t worry about him.  And I just want something light to eat.  I’m still too tired for anything heavy.”
     Chad just curtseyed and said “Yes, Mistress,” before curtseying a second time and continuing on toward the kitchen.  Actually, he had only planned on fixing a salad for her for that very reason.

     It was another thirty minutes before Derek arrived.  Chad had long finished preparing Mel’s dinner salad and had been keeping it waiting in the refrigerator since Mel wanted to wait for Derek.  As he went to the door to open it, he was reminded of that last time he had answered the door for someone – the time that Ray had arrived and he and Derek had argued!  That had turned out a bit scary.  It still sent shivers down his spine.  He was very glad this time to see Derek as he curtseyed and invited him in.
     Derek headed straight for the kitchen table and Chad saw Mel give him a quick kiss on the cheek to greet him.  Something inside of him felt a twinge of… something… at seeing it.  But he quickly put those feelings aside.  He was a sissy.  A big sissy.  He wasn’t allowed to have feelings like that.  Or at least, he wasn’t supposed to.  Not that it mounted to much of difference.
     As he set Mel’s meal out on the table for her, Derek unwrapped a huge sub sandwich.  To Chad it looked like it was big enough to easily feed four people.  And he knew that without a doubt, Derek would finish every bit of it.  Had he ever eaten that much?  Yeah, once upon a time.  Now he ate almost nothing… and it took almost nothing to fill him up.  Just the thought of eating that much in one sitting now made him nauseous.  Derek had a large size drink with him as well so he just poured Mel another cup of coffee.
      “Back to your perch Sissy,” Mel told him as he finished pouring for her.  She looked briefly at Derek and remembered the crazy earrings he had brought last time to hold Sissy’s head in place.  “And see if you can get those earrings on your head yourself.”
     Chad wasn’t at all happy about having to go back to his corner again.  And he was a lot less happy about having his head locked in place.  And worse, he would have to hook himself up!  But he should have realized that he would be banished to his corner again.  That’s where he usually spent most of his time while Mel was eating. 
     He took another very long drink from his baby bottle – more to delay the inevitable than for the liquid he got, then he headed for his perch in the corner.  One foot at a time, he climbed up onto the bar of his perch, forcing himself into the corner and forcing his feet into a very painful position that he was now all too used to.  A position where the only way he could move his feet was to lift them straight up off of the bar to get out of his corner again. 
     Very carefully, by feel alone, his left hand found the earring hanging down by the chain attached to it.  He brought it up to his ear, but he needed two hands to attach the screw-on earring properly.  And in the corner like he was, it was very difficult.  So difficult, that he couldn’t manage it.  And he realized that even if he did manage it for the first ear, it would be almost impossible for him to attach the second earring to his other ear.
      “Mistress,” he called.  “I can’t do this by myself.”
     Mel had been watching him try to do it.  Derek had turned around in his seat as well.  They had both been briefly entertained by watching him try to figure out how to manage the task.
      “I’ll get it,” Derek said as he pushed his seat back.
      “No,” Mel stopped him.  She called back to Sissy, “See if you can figure out a way!”
     Derek turned his seat a bit more so he could watch better while he ate. 
     Find a way?  Chad had no idea how he was going to do that.  He stepped back off of the perch to take a better look at the situation.  He was glad that Mel didn’t say anything about him getting down off of the stupid thing. 
     He stood back and assessed the situation.  The earrings were hanging by chains from hooks attached to each wall.  But the hooks were bent up a bit so it would be easier to slip the chains on and off of them.  He thought he had it figured out.  He removed the left earring from the wall and screwed it onto his ear.  It was a bit heavier than he expected, but he realized he was suddenly starting to find it a bit exciting.  He took the second earring and attached it to his other ear.  Then he stepped up onto his perch again.  Reaching up with his left hand, he found the chain attached to that earring and fumbled around with it until he managed to slip it over top of the hook.  His head was now attached to the left side of the wall.  One down.  He reached up with his right hand and found that earring chain.  He had to push his head harder into the corner and pull hard on that chain as he tried to find the top of the hook and manage to slip the chain over it.  And suddenly, the chain dropped into place… and his head was locked in place between the two walls of the corner.  Carefully he lowered his hand again.  He could distinctly feel the pull of the earrings on his earlobes.  He must have inadvertently made them tighter than Derek had done last time.  And there was absolutely no way he could move his head at all!
     He was not only stuck on his perch in the corner, he was attached to that corner.  At least this time he didn’t have his hands tied behind his back.  He had been totally helpless then.  So now what?  As usual, he could do nothing but close his eyes and stand there without moving.  He had nothing but his thoughts to occupy his time.  He was put away again – out of the way… as if he was useless.  Well, maybe not useless.  He had a feeling that Mel somehow found it entertaining to see him stuck here like this – like a piece of art.  A picture on the wall or perhaps a statue.  He did feel like that a bit.  But then he was a sissy.  His only lot in life was for the enjoyment and amusement of others.  He still found it amazing that he got such a kick out of it… such a thrill.  He didn’t know why that was, other than the fact that he was a sissy.
     But how much longer was he going to keep getting this kind of thrill?  After today, there would only be Wednesday and Thursday.  After that, the dream would be over.  Over.  Over.  He was forced to wonder, as Andrea had suggested, if he should throw the bet?  Should he purposely lose?  He knew he would have to do it on purpose because he was still sure he could win.  There was just no way that anyone could become incontinent in only two months.  It was impossible!
     But if he won, he would have a wonderfully furnished apartment.  So many things he needed since he had gotten nothing from his divorce.  So many things he had always wanted but never had the money to buy.  So many things!  And yet, he felt nothing but sad because he would lose so much as well.  Chief among them was Mel.  Wow!  She had been great these last two months.  Amazing!  He had done things he never imagined.  And it was all going to be over with soon, unless he purposely lost. 
     She was in there right now with Derek.  Derek.  He remembered the quick kiss Mel had planted on Derek’s cheek when he had arrived and how he had felt… what?  Jealous?  Yeah, that was probably it.  But he was a sissy.  What else could he expect?  But did he want to spend another year enjoying the life of a super sissy, and watching while Mel kissed and made love to Derek… or who knows who else as well?  He was absolutely not sure about that one.
     And as he stood there, totally immobile, he remembered the feeling of Mel kissing him after he had bathed her a few days ago.  The brief feeling of pee spurting out of him coincided with the remembered feeling of her kiss.  His body shivered with delight – all over!

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Crying on the Inside

Last week I uploaded my story “Girlish” to Fictionmania ( fictionmania.tv  or my story list at  http://fictionmania.tv/searchdisplay/authordisplay.html?word=4594  ), and as I always do, I’ve been watching the reviews coming in.  Some of the reviews are very good… and some of them are very bad.  As I expected, “Girlish” is just as controversial a story now as it was when I posted it at storysite.org a long time ago.  And as usual, reading some of the comments makes me feel like it’s time to quit writing – permanently.  Fortunately, I’ve been through this before and I always get over it after a few weeks and the desire to write returns.  Currently though, writing is not something I want to do – not story writing anyway.  Don’t worry, it will come back to me… eventually.    

Please don’t get me wrong!  I appreciate each and every comment that anyone bothers to write, and many of the comments are extremely positive!  Those nice ones are always just like a nice warm hug.  It’s just a few of the other ones that get me feeling down and depressed and confused.

As I’ve said, I’m actually very grateful to all the people who bother to leave a review of my work.  These are the people who were interested enough to bother reading it in the first place.  These are the people who felt strongly enough about my story that they took the time to pass on their opinions about it.  I don’t want them to stop writing their reviews or even sugar-coat them.  I’m grateful for their honest opinions… good or bad!  It’s nice to know what people think!  Sometimes.

The ones who say they were up too long at night because they couldn’t put the story down are my heroes!  The other’s that leave a negative response all leave me feeling sad – I can’t help it… it’s human nature.  And I mostly understand the reasons for what they say, but that doesn’t mean I don’t get disappointed.  As I said, it’s human nature.  But don’t get me wrong…  I DON’T EXPECT EVERYONE TO LIKE MY WORK!  That’s not my point here.  But I’ll get to that point in a minute.

In trying to understand the overall gist of the negative comments, to me, they all seem to boil down to a few of the same things. 

For one, I guess my mind doesn’t always write stories that fit into the “total reality box.”  That’s the little box that holds only stories where everything can only be completely as it would be in real life.  In fact, I don’t think any of my stories actually belong there.  All my works are fantasy – not reality.  I guess it’s difficult for me to understand that so many others who read the stories from that site don’t think that way.  Not only do I not claim that any of my stories are true stories, I state in the beginning that they’re all just a work of fiction and ask them to please take it that way.  I guess I need a better way to get that across.

Another little thing I’ve pieced together, is that what many of my readers are constantly looking for, is justice.  Swift and immediate.  Sooner rather than later.  I totally get that!  I can’t tell you how many stories I’ve read where all I can think about is why the main character doesn’t ignore all the consequences and do something to fight back… or at least go on some maniacal rampage.  Now that I look at it, “Girlish” falls pretty much into this category as well.  But… if that bit of justice actually happens, or if it comes too soon, what would be left of the story?  As much as I hate it, most of my stories don’t contain much in the way of the justice concept.  But then, in real life, many situations don’t get proper justice either.  That’s not an excuse, just an observation.  I’m afraid that when I write, I never know if the concept of justice will happen in my stories or not.  I don’t consciously think about it.  I guess I just kind of go with the flow.

And yes, most of the situations I develop are cruel and sadistic.  But then to me, a story has to have some kind of conflict or problem to revolve around, otherwise there isn’t much of a reason for the story to exist.  And I guess there’s a chance that many of my situations are worse than what other writers devise.  In fact, I don’t seem to write very many “nice” stories  at all.  Sorry.  And if anyone believes that there aren’t any cruel people in the world, then those people don’t get out enough – nor do they probably check to see what’s in the news.

One other thing I’ve been accused of in the past is bad character development.  I’m afraid I’m not good enough to be a judge of that one.  But I try.  I do think my work has as much if not more character development than some of the professional novels that I buy to read for fun.  But that’s just my opinion.  And I respect the fact that everybody is entitled to their own opinion. 

I’m just trying to understand why there’s so much fuss over my simple stories!

I made the mistake this time of checking the reviews for another author who had gotten a good number of reviews in the first week of publication at Fictionmania (not as many as mine, but still much more than the usual one or two).  The story I read was called “Potty Training Buddy” by Tammie2 – which seemed to hit on a lot of the things I like to read and fantasize about – and write about.  Anyway, I was amazed that every last review for that story was very nice and complementary.  I read that story with an eye toward trying to figure out what the difference is.  Why is that story so much better than mine?  And while I thoroughly enjoyed the story, in my opinion, every bad criticism that I got could more easily be applied to that story – yet I didn’t see one derogatory remark there at all.  Please don’t go out now and do something stupid to another author who doesn’t deserve it!

So here it is…

What is it about my writing that evokes such volatile responses?  At times, the reviewers almost seem to be arguing with each other!  And I’m talking about all my stories now, not just “Girlish.”  Check out the comments on “Baby Bobby” if you want to see another big debate ( http://fictionmania.tv/review/readreview.html?fbcntrl=21979 ).  Do other authors get this kind of division over their stories?  What is it about my works that inspire this kind of reaction – both good and bad.  And as far as I can tell, the good and bad comments are so totally polar opposite that there is very little left in the middle. 

I guess though that I’m asking the wrong question.  The better question should be:  Should I feel happy that my stories cause this kind of reaction?  And overall, I think the answer should be “yes!”  Like it or not, my work is provoking an emotional response – good or bad – in my readers.  And it’s enough of a reaction that they not only take the time to read my work, but they go to the extra effort to write something about it – for good or bad.  And I appreciate that – a lot!  For good or bad.

But it still leaves me wondering if any other authors get that kind of reaction… or is it just me?  I guess I need to check on that a bit more.


In April, I plan to start uploading to Fictionmania, the individual chapters of “The Bet.”  This will be the version that I’m currently working on editing right now to fix little things like a million punctuation errors.  I’m not rewriting the story!  I’m only editing it!  My plans are to once or twice a week, upload full chapters – not the chapter segments you are getting now.  It should still take me most of the rest of the year to upload this little footnote of history to that site.

But now after uploading Girlish and seeing the responses, I’m left wondering a few things about “The Bet.” 

I’m totally amazed at the number of people from all around the world who are following “The Bet” regularly.  Currently, my 30 day total of hits is coming to just under 9,000 and my daily hits range between 250 per day to 400 per day.  Can you guess which days get the most hits?  Actually, back in October, before I went on vacation, I was getting over 11,000 hits in a 30 day period.  I guess a lot of people gave up while I was away for a week.  But I’m still totally amazed at how many people – from all over the world – are following loyally.  Thank you!  Thank you!  Thank you!

Anyway, after studying comments… and now editing “The Bet”… and knowing how many readers I’ve got… and the fact that we’re now well into the home stretch for “The Bet”, I’ve started wondering some things. 

I know for a fact that all the people reading “The Bet” have to have different reactions and feelings about the characters.   I wonder if any readers actually identify with Chad, or with Mel, or perhaps one of the other characters?  Does anyone see themselves in any of the characters?

And how many of my readers just think that Mel is nothing but a cruel, heartless, sadistic bitch?

And how many readers wish they were in Chad’s shoes… or perhaps Mel’s?

And I guess the big question everyone is bound to have is… who’s going to win this thing?  I’m sure there are more than a few who think Mel is going to win… just as there are also some who think Chad will win.

To be fair, I guess another question along that line would be to ask who you want to see win, not who you think will win?  I wonder how many people don’t care?

It is my fondest hope that before I get to the very last posting of this story, most of you won’t be able to figure out who is going to win.  I can’t tell you how difficult that is, but that’s what I’ve attempted to do.  Well, I’ve tried anyway.

And finally, after all the soul searching I’ve done about my writing, I’m once again drawn back to one fact that has guided me for many, many years.  I write for me!  I don’t write for anyone else.  I don’t write what others want me to write.  I write what I want to write.  I write what my mind wants to be in the story.  If the story isn’t realistic – then so be it!  If the story contains sadistic cruelty – then so be it!  Believe it or not, more often than not, I’m not in charge of what gets written.  The story is in charge.  I just let my little fingers wander over the keyboard and I’m as surprised at what I type as you probably are when you read it.  I rarely know in advance what’s going to come out.  Fortunately, most of the time, I’m very pleased. 

And in the end, after I create something, I do like to share it in any way that I can.  Hence, this blog, as well as uploading them to a story site where they can be stumbled across and enjoyed for years to come by anyone who has the interest.  I’ve spent many happy hours reading “free” material that was created by people who wanted to share.  I guess I feel the same.

So that’s my little rant for today.  Sorry for venting to you all.  Don’t worry, I’ll get over it.