By Karen Singer
Chapter 16 (Part 1 of 3)
Tears fell from Roger’s eyes… not that anyone would notice. His room was dark since it was the middle of the night… or perhaps all too early in the morning. But the sun wasn’t up yet, so to Roger, it was still night. The tears were from many things. Defeat. Humiliation. Frustration. Agony. To name just a few.
Defeat because she had once again reinforced all those horrible things he now lived with: the miserable steel wall that held all his will power to disobey her on the other side, the command that made his cock freeze miserably every time he saw a pretty woman… or girl, and the added knowledge that no matter what, his first concern would always be to protect them… despite how much he would rather kill both of them.
He felt humiliated by so much of his life now as well. Having to eat all his meals from a dog bowl on the floor without the use of his hands. Having to wear silly frilly panties instead of his normal underwear all the time. Having to wear a bra all the time with balled up socks inside of it to give him the outer illusion of breasts. Having to wear the stupid high-heeled boots she had bought him as work boots… and now of course the new horror of the miserable high heeled shoes strapped to his feet – that he wasn’t allowed to remove for any reason at all. Not to mention the humiliation of having to sleep naked and chained up every night.
He had so much frustration in his life. Frustration over all the many things that had been done to him… things that had insured his cooperation no matter how much he hated it. Frustration over not being able to tell the authorities what had been done to him, not only because her conditioning had made that impossible, but because if he did, he would soon find himself in jail for things he never did in the first place. A total no win situation! He also felt frustration over having to quit teaching – a job he really loved. And of course, right now he was frustrated by being chained horribly and very uncomfortably… as well as frustrated over not being able to remove the miserable high-heeled shoes from his feet.
And then there was the agony. The agony of being unable to fight Janice Brinkley. The agony of having to endure whatever torments she decided. The agony of having his entire life ruined. And right then, the very major painful agony from the shoes currently destroying his feet.
If only he could just move. If only he could just remove those stupid shoes… even for a few minutes. But he knew perfectly well that even if he wasn’t chained like he was, the shoes would remain strapped firmly to his feet… as if they were glued there. Only while he was in the shower – it was the only time the shoes could be removed from his feet. He wondered if he should feel lucky to get even those few minutes… but somehow he didn’t feel lucky about that at all.
He thought briefly about crying out… asking for help. Asking them to please release him… or at least please do something to relieve some of his pain or discomfort. But he had seen first-hand what Carol was capable of doing if he annoyed her in any way. And her mother was even worse. He didn’t want to face what either of them might do to him if he disturbed them in any way.
With his hands chained behind his back… the chain from the cuffs stretching down to his ankles where his legs were wrapped in the chains that went from there to the bed frame a few feet away. He couldn’t move very well at all. He had discovered during the night that he could roll over onto his side, but the change of position quickly grew just as tiring and he rolled onto his stomach again… only to roll to his other side a few minutes later… only to roll onto his stomach again. It was a never ending battle. Every few minutes he tried to relieve the hurt by moving some, only to find that it didn’t help at all. It made for a very, very long night.
He had dozed though. A little. Full sleep was nearly impossible, but at least he had managed to doze some. He was praying now for morning… praying for Janice or Carol to come and release him. Praying for the time he could get into the shower when he could finally remove the shoes that now had both his feet feeling like they were filled with pins and needles. That is, he would get into the shower if he could still walk to get there. But even crawling was now acceptable to him. In fact, in might even be preferable. He just wanted to be free. Free from the shoes. Free from the chains. Free from Janice and her monster of a daughter. Free!
But freedom was impossible.
He closed his eyes and tried to sleep again. And soon rolled onto his side. A bit later, he rolled to his other side. But at least he dozed… some.
With no curtains on the window, he was more aware than ever of the sun coming up. But as much as he prayed for a quick release, it wasn’t happening. It seemed like hours before he heard the alarm going off in a distant part of the house – his old alarm in his old bedroom… now Janice’s bedroom. Would she come in and release him now? But instead he heard her going into Carol’s room and lovingly waking her. He expected to be released then, but nobody opened his bedroom door. He was stuck right where he was. Were they ever going to release him?
He heard Carol come out of her bedroom and go into the bathroom. He waited and waited. She was in there a very long time – probably taking a shower… or a bath. But when she came out, she didn’t come release him. She went back to her own room instead and he was stuck waiting again. And waiting. And waiting. He heard a door opening, then a moment later, his door was opened – finally!
Janice peeked inside Roger’s room. He was still chained up the way Carol had left him last night… unable to move. The position didn’t look very comfortable, but she didn’t care in the least. He was still where he was supposed to be and that’s all she cared about. Not saying a word, she closed the door again and headed to the kitchen. It was Easter Sunday. A holiday. More, it was the first full day that Carol would be back with her again – forever! She decided a special breakfast was in order.
Roger died when Janice never said a single word to him. She just left him there and closed the door again. Ugh! Why wouldn’t she release him?
He heard Carol come out of her room and pass right by his door. Then he heard nothing at all for a while. Finally, he heard footsteps coming back down the hall again and his door being opened. He saw Carol come in. Would she finally release him? Please???
Carol was glad to see Roger still trussed up exactly as she had left him. She was glad because he looked so uncomfortable, and she was glad because she hadn’t had time to really think up a good way to secure him. Maybe the next time her mother asked her to do it she could come up with something better. She bent over him and unlocked his handcuffs, then she went down to where the lock was on the chain and opened that as well. “Momma says to get your shower now and get dressed. And you better hurry up about it because we’ve got church today.” She giggled slightly. “Momma said to remind you not to forget your little breasts under your suit… and of course you’ll still have to wear those very pretty shoes you’ve got on. I’m sure you must really love them! Now hurry up!” she commanded. With a giggle, she left him and headed back to the kitchen.
The command to hurry up couldn’t be ignored, just as he couldn’t ignore any of her other commands. But could he even stand up now… let along walk into the bathroom? His feet were totally numb, but by holding onto the bed frame, he was able to climb his way to his feet. It was a moment though before he attempted walking.
He usually shaved before he showered, but today he was considering taking his shower first – just to get out of the shoes a few minutes earlier. But doing that would only land him in the shoes again sooner rather than later. So since it wouldn’t make that much of a difference, he shaved before taking the time to sit on the toilet seat and finally work on unstrapping the miserable torture devices from his feet. Once he had the left shoe unstrapped, he grabbed it and had to pull it off of his foot. His foot didn’t hurt any less. He tried to bend his toes, and for a moment, he couldn’t. But painfully, his toes did finally bend. Painfully, and wonderfully. He flexed his entire foot over and over again, loosening the muscles up until they worked once again. And then he finally attacked the right foot where he had to repeat the entire process before he could get into the shower.
A white shirt with a dark red tie. His charcoal sports jacket and a slightly darker shade of pants. He would have felt almost normal if it wasn’t for the frilly pink panties he was wearing underneath – coupled with a bra with balled up socks in each of the cups… and lest he forget, women’s knee-hi hose and black very high heeled shoes strapped to his feet. And she expected him to go to church this way? Of course she did!
“Mr. Brinkley,” Janice called as she headed down the hallway. She got to his room and opened the door. “There you are.” She took a moment to look him over. “I must say, you did a good job of selecting which clothes to wear to day. Those trousers go very nicely with your new shoes. They could be an inch or two longer, but other than that, I think they go very nicely.”
Roger also felt that his pants could be longer – so that they would completely cover the stupid shoes he was wearing so they wouldn’t be seen as much. As it was, his pants only came down just below his ankle, hiding the top strap around his ankle, and not much more.
“Come along, Mr. Brinkley. Carol and I have already eaten breakfast and yours is still waiting for you. You’re going to need to hurry and eat while we’re finishing getting ready.”
After her little “refresher” training last night, Roger’s body was already moving before he realized it. A minute later, he was dropping to his hands and knees and lowering his head into his dog bowl to eat – pancakes! With maple syrup! Very good – and very messy! Despite how he was forced to eat, his breakfast actually tasted good.
The long ride to church was the same as it was the week before, except this time Roger was overly anxious about getting out of the car in the shoes he had on. He absolutely couldn’t understand how Janice would want him to go to church dressed as he was. It was… unthinkable! Yet it appeared that he was doing it. But as tired as he was from not sleeping well all night, it was the fear over what he was about to be doing that kept him awake through the entire drive there.
The parking lot of the “Free Spirit Nondenominational Church” was far more packed today than it had been last week. He figured that it was so crowded only because it was Easter Sunday and everyone had come out for the holiday. Despite the cloudy skies, Roger could see a lot of people standing around and talking outside of the place. Couldn’t they get inside… where they wouldn’t have to see him walking up there in his stupid shoes?
The closest parking spot that Janice could find was quite a ways from the entrance to the makeshift church. She and Carol got out of the car happily. Roger forced himself to get out… not so happily. He hung back, following nervously behind as they headed across the parking lot. He could hear his stupid high heels making similar sounds to the shoes both Janice and Carol were wearing. Hopefully, the noise of their shoes would hide the sound of his. He felt so embarrassed it wasn’t funny… and they hadn’t even gotten close to the place yet.
As they approached, he saw more and more heads start to turn in their direction… and more and more smiles on the faces of the people. Fortunately, he was sure that they were only looking at Janice and Carol. But that didn’t last long as he saw a few faces suddenly looking all too strangely at him. He could feel his face turning red as he now stared mostly down toward the pavement that his stupid high heels were traversing.
“Janice!” a friendly female voice called.
Roger looked up to see a woman and a man looking at them. The woman was holding her arms out toward Janice, who immediately went up and hugged her. Roger held back, ashamedly, while the woman and her husband spoke briefly with Janice and Carol. But shortly after that greeting, the woman turned toward him.
“Oh,” Janice told her, “this is a friend… Roger Brinkley.”
Roger was forced to say hi, and oddly, shake the hand of the man with the woman.
“Always nice to see a new face here,” the man told Roger.
“Thanks Roger replied as he took in how carefully the man was assessing his appearance – from his head all the way down to his feet. But fortunately, other than that, nothing was said about the “odd” way that he was dressed.
Following Janice, he gradually made his way into the building itself, which was even more crowded. Inside, he was again very aware of the large mixture of people there. People of all types – including the obvious transvestites who he noticed were all looking him over all too interestedly.
He was hanging back again, while Janice was talking with yet more friends, when someone suddenly patted his arm. He turned and found himself face to face with… a group of those transvestites… or transsexuals… he wasn’t sure which.
“We saw you here last week!” one of the “less” obvious ones said to him – in an all too breathy voice that sounded mostly gay to Roger. “We’re so glad you came back again.”
Roger nodded. “Yeah, I was here last week,” he confirmed. Then just for something else to say, he added, “I was quite taken by how well your minister spoke.”
“Oh she is good!” another of them replied.
Roger noticed one of them staring all too intently at his shoes. Of course “he” was wearing a very colorful dress and high heels himself… not to mention that he was made up totally as a woman… more or less convincingly. Since the “person” was staring so intently at his shoes, Roger braved shoving his left foot forward a bit so the “person” could see it better.
“I really, really love your shoes,” the “person” said as he continued to stare at them.
Roger was saved from saying thanks, when another of them spoke up. “You know, one of the great things about this church is that nobody here judges anyone else. Everyone is different – all of us. And we seem to celebrate that spirit here. So honey, I can see that you’re trying to be brave and go slow about what you’re wearing, but if next week you’d like to show up in a dress, honey, nobody will say anything bad about it at all. Trust me!”
Roger saw the others nodding their agreement… and he could feel himself blushing again. Not knowing what else to say, he replied, “Uh… thanks.” He certainly hoped that Janice wouldn’t make him wear a damn dress next time, but he never knew what she would do. The damn woman was capable of absolutely anything!
Despite it being a holiday, and the church being much more crowded, the service itself was much as it was last week. And once again Roger found what the woman preacher talked about to be both interesting… and inspirational. Not that any of it would do him any good.
There was more greeting and a few more nervous handshakes after the service… and a few people commenting about his new shoes… and another person who told him not to worry about feeing self-conscious there – yeah right! And when it was over, Roger was more than glad to get back into the car again – and out of sight.
“I noticed you’re starting to collect some friends, Mr. Brinkley,” Janice said as she started the car. “I think that’s wonderful!”
Friends? That was the last thing that Roger wanted to think about the people he had met. He wasn’t sure he wanted that kind of “friends” at all. But at least they had all been somewhat kind to him and as they all had said, nobody there had seemed to laugh or even look down at him in any way at all. And that thought was very comforting.
“I’m afraid that since this is Easter Sunday,” Janice said as she turned the car onto the interstate, “that most of the restaurants will be either closed or overly crowded, so I’ll just fix us something light for dinner when we get home.”
Roger was glad. The last place he wanted to go was somewhere else in public. Especially since anywhere else would only be that much more embarrassing. Now that church was over with and all the worry was behind him, Roger fell sound asleep in the back of the car for the rest of the trip home. He didn’t wake up until Janice herself woke him – after she had pulled into the garage.
“Mr. Brinkley,” she said as Roger was heading, still foggy-headed, toward his bedroom to change into his work clothes. Roger turned back to hear what she wanted now. “Don’t bother putting your work clothes on,” she told him. “This is Easter Sunday and I’ll not have you working today.”
Roger was very surprised. And immediately he started hoping he could get in a good nap!
“Since you won’t be working,” she continued, “just take those clothes off and you can stay naked all day. Except for those pretty shoes of course,” she added with an all too obvious grin.
Naked? All day? Why not? It was no worse than much of what he had been through lately. In fact, it was no problem to him at all. He just wished he could get out of the stupid shoes he was wearing. Once he was totally undressed, and since Janice hadn’t given him any instructions, Roger laid down on the new carpeting in his bedroom once again – and this time using his sweatshirts for a pillow and a flannel shirt for a blanket, fell sound asleep – despite how uncomfortable the shoes were on his feet. Ahhh!