by Karen Singer
Chapter 48 (Thursday – week 7 Part 1 of 7)
The clock was well on its way towards morning when she dreamed her final dream of the night. She was on stage, in her beautiful pink ballet costume, dancing for a huge audience in a grand theatre. But it wasn’t her as she was now, it was her as she was in high-school – the last time she wore that ballet costume. She was thinner, lither… younger. Not that she noticed that in her dream.
The music started and she danced. Beautifully! Fantastically! And the audience was quickly on their feet in appreciation. But it was a short dance, only a small part of her program for the evening. The music ended and she finished with a pose that left her gesturing towards the opposite side of the stage, where Sissy was, also in his pink ballet costume.
The same music started again, but this time it was Sissy’s turn to dance… the same dance. The audience was shocked. He was doing very well! Not up to her ability of course, but far better than any other man could do. Far more graceful and… feminine! And when he finished his portion, the audience cheered… not just for him… but for her. Because this evening wasn’t about her dancing, it was about showing the world how she had taught him… a mere man… almost an animal… how she had taught him to dance so well.
Then it was her turn again. Another short piece of music, another dance… followed by Sissy repeating what she had just done. Back and forth they went, her demonstrating how she would do it, followed by him showing the world how well she had taught him. And the audience was amazed!
They continued back and forth like that, until midway in one of her dances, midway in one of her great leaps, her alarm clock buzzed.
She reached over and turned the annoying thing off. It had been such a nice dream. Why did morning have to come now? She sat up on the side of her bed for a moment before getting to her feet. Grabbing her robe, she headed out to her kitchen, following her routine of habit that made her think of nothing but a fresh cup of coffee to help get her going. Coffee! It would taste so good!
He was partially awake by the time the miserable loud blaring rock music crashed out of his pink clock radio, but that didn’t make it any less shocking. One minute he had been laying in bed, enjoying the peaceful relaxation, and the next he was in a state of panic, scrambling as fast as he could to roll off of his blow-up mattress and turn off his alarm. Empty baby bottles were scattered everywhere in the process as he quickly rolled out of bed. Silence was returned to the room instantly with the click of a button, but after such loud noise, the sudden silence was a shocking silence.
Still on his knees, he took a moment to catch his breath and calm down after his panicked activity. A moment later, his brain began to wake enough to take in other sensations – sensations that really felt all too normal to him now. His diapers were heavily bloated – as usual. Messy too – as usual. His bra was holding up the heavy breast forms that were strongly glued to his chest – as usual. And his pacifier was again in his mouth – as usual. Overall… it was all just the usual. His normal morning wake-up situation. Normal for him… now.
He climbed awkwardly to his feet, struggling a bit against the bulk of his overly bloated diapers, and waddled his way out to his kitchen to see if she had left him a note during the night. He could no longer say that she always left him a note, but she usually did. He was glad to see that the note was there again today. The usual. And it felt… comforting. Most of the note could have been copied from many of the notes before it, except for one minor addition today. When he went to her apartment, Mel wanted him to have his pacifier in his mouth again. She sometimes asked for it, and she sometimes didn’t. So very often, he left it out. His life was so humiliating all the time, that any tiny little things he could do to make it less so were always welcome opportunities.
He grabbed three baby bottles out of his refrigerator and carried them out to his solitary chair. He sat slowly and gingerly, afraid that his raw backside might still be as bad as it was yesterday. But while he could feel it, it was much more tolerable today. No problem. He mostly closed his eyes as he sat drinking bottle after bottle, because there was nothing he wanted to see. Certainly not the childishly colored pictures Mel had made him do in the restaurants a while back… and also certainly not the framed contract of the bet between them. That he didn’t want to see at all! There was also the design that Sandy had done – the design for his nursery – if he lost this bet. But while just the thought of a nursery like that sent thrills through his under-exercised sexual needs, it was also something that he didn’t want to see – because he had to win this bet!
As he drank bottle after bottle, he noticed himself peeing a few times. No warning, no anything. If he had been busy with something else he might not have even noticed he was doing it. So interesting! It was amazing how interesting such a feeling could be… or maybe it was more like, it was amazing how interesting the lack of feeling could be. Later this morning, after his body had a chance to rid itself of all the liquid he was required to drink before he went to work, then he would start working on his ability to hold back again. But doing it now would be a useless exercise. Too much liquid pouring into his system too fast. It was better to get let it out of him as soon as possible. It was the only way he stood a chance.
With his bottles finally finished, he got up and headed to the bathroom where he would finally remove his bloated and messy diapers – and get ready for the day ahead. Things had been bad enough with just Mel dominating him. But now he had Robin at work to worry about too. He remembered spending hours yesterday sitting in the dark corner underneath her desk, with his thumb taped firmly in his mouth so he couldn’t remove it, unable to leave her corner. He prayed she wouldn’t do that to him again! Yet at the same time, the very same thought thrilled him. But then, what else would it do, he was a sissy.
Mel stirred the pot of baby food she was cooking for Sissy and turned the heat off. She poured the contents of the pot into a colorful child’s plastic bowl and set the pot back on the stove again. Now all she needed was Sissy. She glanced at the clock… and heard him knocking at her door at the same time. Right on time! A few seconds later, she opened her door for him.
“Good morning Mistress,” Chad tried to say around the pacifier in his mouth as he curtseyed for her. But what came out was mostly unintelligible. He realized as he said it though that talking with a pacifier in his mouth had one very good result, he didn’t have to worry about using his new and improved sissy voice, because talking with a lisp was pretty much out of the question!
“Good morning Sissy,” Mel replied as she stood back out of the way and let him enter. As she waited till he stowed his purse and diaper bag under her table by the door, she started looking him over. A simple skirt and blouse today. Not overly colorful, but he looked acceptable. She had already noticed the wooden necklace he was wearing earlier. She waited till he stood up straight again before she started looking him over more carefully. His hair was curled acceptably. His makeup was… acceptable. She noticed the pink studs in his ears today which seemed to go well enough with the red in the pattern of the blouse he was wearing. Overall, he looked… fine. Especially for a man dressing like a woman. For that, she was sure he was probably a bit better than fine. But was fine good enough? She decided she needed to start looking for ways to make him look even better. The more she made him look less like a man… the better! It would be like denying him yet more of his masculinity. “Okay Sissy, climb up into your highchair.”
Chad worked his way up onto his highchair and waited while Mel put the tray in place and tied a bib around his neck, just as she usually did. A minute later he was trying to spoon baby cereal into his mouth from a tiny rubber coated baby spoon held tightly in his left fist – just as usual. The routine was becoming so familiar now that it had become almost comfortable. Not that he’d ever let Mel know that. She would undoubtedly make things worse! Somehow.
Robin sat on her bed. She was all dressed and ready to leave for work, physically anyway. She stared at the large bag she carried every day. She had packed a few more items in it today than she usually did. She also usually carried a stack of magazines and other things in case she might want them during the day, but that stack was missing today. She was fairly certain she wouldn’t need them.
Her problem was… Sissy. And her. Last night it had all seemed so simple. So easy. But this morning, after a night to sleep on it, and after another night to think about what she had been contemplating doing with him, well… she was having second thoughts. Grave misgivings actually. What should she do?
It wasn’t right! Not by any measure she could think of. It wasn’t her! Not at all! She wasn’t that type! It was all wrong! And the things she had planned for him last night… They were wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Especially at work!
So why had she thought she could do it? And why was she still torn over whether she would actually do it or not? She just didn’t know.
With a sigh, she got up from the bed and grabbed her bag. One bag. No pile of other things. If she didn’t leave now then she would be late for work. She was probably cutting it awfully close as it was.
What should she do?
Chad booted up his computer and waited while it went through the many processes it had to run every morning. Robin wasn’t in yet. He had even gone to go to her cubicle to check. He glanced at his watch, if she didn’t get here soon then she was going to be late. Not that anybody would notice… or care. Of course, he would notice. But did he care? Yeah. Somewhat.
Like a breeze, he more heard the saw someone passing his cubicle. “Robin?” he called. He got up from his seat to go see.
Robin had just set her bag down on her desk when he showed up at her cubicle. She didn’t know if she was annoyed by that or not. She also wasn’t sure how she wanted to handle him today yet… in light of her thoughts earlier this morning.
“I was getting worried about you,” Chad said sincerely in his girly voice.
Robin shook her head. “Why? I’m not late!”
“Not really, but you’re never usually this late getting here.”
Something about that bothered her. Or maybe it was more that he, a sissy, should be concerned about her. She realized it was wrong for her to be bothered by it, but it still irked her. “Don’t worry about me,” she said more angrily than she meant to. Then she stopped and paused to think a moment. It was only because she felt a bit upset at him that she said it, even though part of her knew she shouldn’t. “Say… aren’t you supposed to be curtseying every time you see me? Not to mention… aren’t you supposed to be using your sissy voice around me too?” He was trying to get away with something again… like a child… again. And despite her earlier thoughts it still made her angry… a bit anyway.
Chad actually blushed as he curtseyed and said, “Sowwy Wobin,” in his sissy voice – his old sissy voice. There was no way he was going to use his new and improved sissy voice around her… if he could help it.
Robin watched his little curtsey and apology. It was so ridiculous. A man curtseying! But then Sissy himself was ridiculous – in so many ways. Yet she found she still liked seeing the silly little feminine action. An idea struck her, but then she thought again. It wasn’t right! None of this was right! So she couldn’t! She wouldn’t! But the idea wouldn’t go away. Once it was planted in her brain, it seemed like such a good thing to do. Despite her misgivings! So should she? But it was such a little thing. Nothing at all really. Not at all like the things she had planned last night for him. Finally, she gave into temptation. “You know,” she said, “I don’t see any reason why you can’t greet me real nicely like that every morning when I come in. You could even be standing out in the hallway next to my cubicle, waiting for me every day, just so you can curtsey for me and say hello to me every morning.” She still had her misgivings about it, but really, that wouldn’t be too bad, would it?
She had surprised him yet again. But really, her request was nothing much, just greet her politely every morning. It was only nice. But the problem with that was that she wanted him to do it out in the hallway where anyone else might see him. He thought of something else. “What happens if you get her before I do?”
“Just make sure you’re here ahead of me,” she replied as she reached over to turn on her computer. “Now get out of here and leave me alone. Please!” she added, because she really was having second thoughts now about the request she had just made of him. It wasn’t right! She needed to figure things out! And having him anywhere around wasn’t helping.
She sat in her chair and stared at her bag while her computer booted up. But she wasn’t seeing it. She was too torn over whether she should be dominating him or not. It wasn’t right! But if she didn’t… And this morning as soon as she saw him she had been all too quick to start giving orders again. Despite the fact that she knew it wasn’t right!
So what should she do? She was so torn over the problem. It wasn’t her! She was nice! She wasn’t mean! She wasn’t a bad person… not really. At least she hoped she wasn’t.
With her computer now ready, she opened her email program like she did every morning and was surprised to see an email from Mel – already. Curious, she opened it, even though she was now having serious doubts about everything she was doing.
Doing what you are doing with Sissy should always be on your own terms. I would expect nothing less. It still sounds to me like you are doing marvelously well and don’t really need much of my help. I did have one quick thing to mention, just in case you might be interested. Since you seem to like seeing him with his thumb in his mouth to help keep him quiet, in case you might need it, he should also have a pacifier in his purse too. Feel free to use that if you feel so inclined.
By the way, there is one other brand new development for him on my end. As of tonight, we’ve made a permanent change to his sissy voice. If you’re interested in hearing it, be on the watch for a lot of lisping and the use of other babyish words. Otherwise, it may sound much the same to you. But I definitely think the new things are an improvement.
As always, feel free to call or email me,
Robin couldn’t decide if she should care or not about the few things Mel had mentioned. She was more inclined right now to find a different way to deal with Sissy than to try dominating him like she thought she could. Something much… saner! But one thing did click in the back of her mind from Mel’s short email, what little she had heard out of Sissy’s mouth this morning hadn’t contained any lisping at all, so he was probably trying to hide something again… which still irked her even though she knew it shouldn’t.
Why should she care? She wasn’t that kind of person? It was all wrong! She was very tempted to march right over to his cubicle and apologize for the way she had behaved and to retract all her orders. But then what? She supposed she would just have to figure out how to work around him without getting angry. And probably without feeling totally repulsed by him too. And that wasn’t going to be easy. Not by a long shot.
Besides, she now had a different problem with him. Now that her eyes had been opened to what he really was, she was seeing different things about him that she had never bothered to notice before. Things that irked her terribly. He was so darn childish! In so many ways! And she couldn’t help it, because right now, it bothered her!
So… what the heck was she supposed to do?
Chad sat quietly at his desk, afraid to make the least little noise that might upset Robin. Once again he had nothing to do. Maybe he should start doing like Robin did and bring a bunch of magazines and stuff with him to look at. But he wasn’t really the magazine type. Besides, he could find everything he wanted on the internet.
He didn’t understand at all why Robin wouldn’t let him help with the project. It made no sense! But every time he had mentioned helping in the past, it only seemed to make her angry. So he said nothing and stayed as quiet as he could.
With nothing at all to do, he again opened up his internet browser. What should he search for? Today, he typed in the word ‘sissy.’